nomadic ramblings

FML.

2010-02-13T07:33:00.000-08:00

I haven't been blogging for fear of ranting about the same things over and over again.
Lo and behold, here I am, about to rant about the constant thing in my life that never changes.

I told myself I'd give it until the end of 2009. Nothing.

Earlier, I was thinking, maybe something's up for tomorrow. But, then again, everything is just so predictable. And I'm getting tired of predictable. Surprise me. Even once in a while.

I wanted to get flowers on Valentine's day. It's been a long time since I last received flowers. 4 years to be exact tomorrow. A colleague received flowers, and she was pretty freaked out about it. I got pretty freaked out when I used to receive stuff from people I wasn't really attracted to (I mean, come on, you'd have to agree-- if you didn't like the person, you'd freak. If you did like the person, you'd get kilig.). I told her to savour the moment while all attention rains down on her. I should've brought home her bouquet of red roses instead.

I was planning on watching a really cheezy movie. To freak the crap out of him. My revenge for keeping me waiting for nothing for today. Anybody seen Valentine's Day? Or maybe just watch Dear John? From the title and movie poster it looked really cheezy. As in maximum cringe factor.

Until when am I going to wait? Until when am I going to settle with predictable?

REALLY.

FML.

Because Im soooo BORED!

2007-09-14T00:47:00.000-07:00

Your Birthdate: August 31

You don't love lightly. For you, love is always a serious undertaking.
However, you are able to love many types of people. You can bring out the best in almost anyone.
Love surprises you often. You never know when or where you'll find it next.

Number of True Loves You'll Have: 2

Number of Times You'll Have Your Heart Broken: 1

You are most compatible with people born on the 4th, 13th, 22nd, and 31st of the month.

What Does Your Birth Date Mean For Your Love Life?

fingers crossed.

2007-05-29T20:42:00.000-07:00

i haven't blogged... IN A LONG TIME.

i joined the blogging community ages ago to serve as an outlet where i can ran't without limits, instead of bashing people to their face (literally). ha!

i'm keeping my fingers crossed for next week.

i'm taking baby steps to make my life better ( i think!)... need to pull in the moolah
to keep myself sane (that is, more funds for retail therapy). it's really true, no matter how shallow you perceive it. come on, Money can buy happiness (if only temporarily). get a haircut, have your hair colored, get a mani-pedi, a full body massage (1.5 hours for me), get that cute top just because.. eat unlimited Shakey's special pizzas... get a nice watch, shoes you wish you could walk in forever. Money is the answer. or not.

But money is only good if you share it...especially with the people you love. Here's what I'd give to the important people in my life:
1. My dad- stocks, stocks, stocks. And an X5. and a Rolex...and a NEW HOUSE.
2. My mom - a wardrobe overhaul and make-over, her own driver and her own Volvo and corrective surgery (to fix her scoliosis). and a Rolex (to match with my dad's watch)
3. My sister- a wardrobe overhaul and make-over, SHOES and bags. and a Philip Stein watch (help with medschool stress).
4. My brother- I would send him to school again and probably have his brain re-formatted.

5. John - ohhh.. I love him because we have similar tastes in life.
nice spiffy shoes for work
a new celfone
a Rolex
an updated Philippines Restaurant Guide
a deep tissue massage
SCUBA training. so i can finally have a dive buddy
Palawan escapade

6. My adopted siblings
Dylan - her own yaya, dog food / eggnog vendo
- prophylaxis c/o Animal House every week
- her own room with her own bed and aircon
Hope- her own yaya to do nothing but brush her hair everyday
- prophylaxis c/o Animal House every week
- Anal Sac draining every 2 weeks
- her own room with her own bed and aircon
- eggnog vendo
Chubby
- her own house to bring down
- dog food vendo
Gretta
- her own house
-dog food vendo
- her own yaya to do nothing but make her pansin 24/7
Miu Miu
- his own cat house
- unlimited supply of plastic flowers to play with (yeah, my cat's gay like that)
- his own bathroom with auto-disposal and auto-replacement of kitty litter
- cat food vendo

If I'd have enough money to give these to the people I love, I could die happy.

HA!

out of focus.

2007-03-01T19:46:00.000-08:00

i think im probably out of it.

im always stuck waiting for things to happen. and what really sucks is that i can't seem to change the damn pattern. i know that i dont want waiting. who the hell wants to wait anyway? but they say that patience is a virtue. and i really think if i wait long enough it'll come around. but deep down inside there's this gut feeling that i might not make it. we might not make it.

is it demanding to see more than the given? as in the given given given GIVEN time (i.e. weekends) ? why should it be so full of effort when it's supposed to be effortless? should you equate being with someone to what it will cost you financially? or because it's just not practical? or am i too jaded, stuck in highschool? but don't you want to get that HIGHSCHOOL HIGH once in a while?

and you get blamed for being the bitch. is it all accepting the other and dropping everything such as your beliefs and principles no matter how silly they may seem?

fuck this. i need a holiday.

fight or flight

2006-10-25T21:12:00.000-07:00

fight or flight.

The fight-or-flight response, also called the acute stress response, was first described by Walter Cannon in 1929. His theory states that animals react to threats with a general discharge of the sympathetic nervous system, priming the animal for fighting or fleeing. This response was later recognized as the first stage of a general adaptation syndrome that regulates stress responses among vertebrates and other organisms. -- Wikipedia

Oh I've been in this situation one too many times.

Don't we all have the right to whine, complain or in certain extreme cases, shove it up to the receiving end's face when we are not content, or when that crucial need is lacking or unfulfilled?

I cannot, for the love of God, decipher why everytime that fight response is activated, it is interpreted as a means of incessant nagging. Is it because of the way the concern is delivered? Or maybe because the receiving end simply does not give a shit about my concerns, and is too smothered in the filth of it's sloth.

Maybe it's about time I seriously RECONSIDER the option for flight.

Please don't tell me- I told you so! ... I already know.

fatty fatty

2006-09-20T01:33:00.000-07:00

my favorite jeans consists of this pair i bought for a very very el cheapo price. I like it coz it fits me perfectly and gives the illusion that i have an ass. bwaha!

nowadays, i can barely button it. the price you have to pay for sitting your ass off for hours refusing to get up only for weewee trips or water refills.

someone's getting FAT!

remembering 9/11

2006-09-11T01:54:00.000-07:00

i was at deutsche's wake during that time when people started talking about text messages saying that an airplane crashed into one of the towers of the World Trade Center. yeah right.
but by the time i got home, everyone was already glued to CNN watching as a myriad of horrendous events unfolded.

fast forward to May 2006.

I am walking along Wall Street in New York's financial district, trying to locate the BULL when my uncle asks me what else I want to do and I tell him-- I want to go to GROUND ZERO!
With a bit of reluctance, he accompanies me and my friend, Lovine to the site, showing us the places where he used to work in the area as an accountant.

We finally come to a halt, and I get this creepy, eerie, strange feeling. We were at the site.

I try to take some pictures. This definitely wasn't going to be a camwhore moment. Who in his right mind would want to have a picture taken in front of ground zero smiling?! Tourists listening to those giving little tidbits about how the incident happened, others staring into the big space in front of them, others observing the massive extent of the damage, others offering flowers and saying prayers for the heroes of 9/11.

I try to find my uncle and I get this very very guilty feeling when I saw him. One of his neighbors was among those who died. He was a fire fighter, a hero.

Though he lives on the East village and could always head downtown, he chose not to. Until that day I wanted to. Oh the tourist in me!

I heart New York.

miss cranky pants

2006-09-07T23:13:00.000-07:00

im in dire need of some serious enlightenment. or maybe a pop of midol.yes, here i am blogging the day away. what further thing to do but vent out my thoughts and frustrations to the cyberworld.

hello? anybody there?

haven't been doing much lately except gorge on dvd's!
my dad got a cheap-ass DVD player so we can finally watch downstairs in the living room. beats having to leave my 'rents room in the middle of the movie to migrate to my laptop when my dad needs to watch the telly.

anyway, what's ultimately annoying about this DVD player (Orange yung tatak) is that it's supposed to be able to play virtually any pirated DVD.WRONG! i noticed, there are certain types of DVD's it can't play. particularly those disks that look like they're made out of plastic.
the price you pay for being such a cheap-ass. tsk.tsk.

i was able to finish both seasons of grey's anatomy and am finding time to watch desperate housewives and prison break! they just started showing part 2 of prison break's first season on the crime suspense channel.i can't wait to watch the second season though! why did i have to watch the end of the first season when i was in the states? binitin ko lang sarili ko.

ugh. anyway, september is a busy busy month! more particularly, it's the time when my patience is tested! like pushing it to the brink... it's BAR month which means i have to be really really nice and supportive...which i am doing thank you very much. but of course i can't help it when i'm in a crappymood and this person is just so LABO and fickle to talk to.

been busy watching Rockstar Supernova, which I think is way better than the first season's INXS. I guess because the jury (Supernova) connects better with the audience (unlike INXS, which wasn't really that popularas compared to Guns N' Roses, Metallica and Motley Crue, here in the Philippines--in my humble opinion). and the talent base this season is just awesome.(Ugh. I can't believe i just used that word haha!)

of course I only knew who Tommy Lee was (more of because of Pam fakest boobs Anderson)but who the hell is Gilbey Clarke and Jason Newsted?! I find out later on that Gilbey was a former member of GNR (sino siya doon?!? I can remember Axle, Duff, Slash but NOT HIM).who did a short stint with them (figures). And Jason Newsted was the former basis of Metallica. W-O-W. haha. I actually had to google GNR... and found out that Axle Rose is STILL ALIVE and so is GNR!

I loved GNR when I was a kid. Perfect rebel music. Were you able to see the devils? Or listen to the tape backwards ( I tried but couldn't get it)...We even bought the score for November Rain (I could play the intro on the piano but my wonder freak sister could play the entire song)... Which I later on exchanged for a freaking Beauty and the Beast/ Disney piece.
though I love rock and roll, I think I loved listening to it when I was a kid (or during my puberty years) mostly because I loved the NOISE and loved to bang my head like crazy.
I have no room in my heart for TUPAC or Notorious BIG or whoever else (dead or alive) rapper.

only Snoop. and maybe Vanilla Ice. ha!

Back in the day when everyone started playing the guitar, most can attribute their first string session to Extreme's More Than Words. I was taught STP's PLUSH. HAHA!

In any case, watching the show takes me back to my musical roots---rock and roll.I was never an a hopper haha but I do confess I'm an ultimate 80's pop victim!Grew up listening and singing along to Menudo, Madonna, Tiffany, Cindy Lauper, Debbie Gibson (okay wasn't she like early 90's ? whatev) and trying to belt out tunes by Whitney and Natalie Cole.

Now... if I can only find time to restring my guitar...

My favorites:
1. Sweet Child of Mine ( I can still remember people showing off how they can play the intro)
2. Welcome to the Jungle (pure NOISE!)
3. Enter Sandman

Hmmm.. in retrospect,I think I just really listened to GNR and Metallica (what can I do, mainstream). I think I couldn't stomach Mega Deathor Black Sabbath anymore. Maybe because when Bon Jovi's Keep the Faithalbum came out, I was also exposed to more ARENA rock tunes.
Anyway, enough music talk. I'd rather listen to my fave fave fave STP song, Interstate Love Song.

Other things I've been minding my business on:
Bryan Boy and The Bag Hag.
Pure ditzy bliss.

Can't wait for this hell of a month to be over!

lethargic

2006-07-30T23:11:00.000-07:00

i am feeling utterly useless today.
the rain really bogs me down to this very lethargic state of mind.
the weather becomes the perfect catalyst for another one of those quarter-life crisis moments.

my boss just left last week for Hawaii to study his masters.
we don't know if he's coming back, we'll find out in a year or so.

i guess the only plus point for this damn rainy season is i got to meet the fab 5!
especially kyan...dream come true.
nevermind the fact that others might say jologs, how can i let this chance pass my by?

i've been reading rich dad poor dad.
i hate books that make me think.they get me all depressed.
and so, in my incoherence today i will try to leave you at leastwith something more concrete...

it's raining cats and dogs

2006-07-12T21:10:00.000-07:00

Your Theme Song is Born to Be Wild by Steppenwolf

"I like smoke and lightningHeavy metal thunderRacin' with the windAnd the feelin' that I'm under"
A total independent spirit, you can't be held down or fenced in.You crave the feeling of wind on your face... and totally freedom.

What's" Your Theme Song?

bored on a rainy thursday. pero mas bored si joey puno. haha!

T-A-G! I'm IT!

2006-06-01T02:08:00.000-07:00

I'm trying to distract myself right now to somehow speed up the ticking of the clock. I can't wait til 530 so I can go home ! My eyes are literally on the verge of popping out from their sockets and my brain most likely to suffer cerebral hemmorhage if I continue facing the PC for a tad bit longer.

Anyway, I was reading through Ther's more insiteful blogs and saw her tag-thingy... Well I'm not sure if I'm the Joy she tagged but what the heck,I'll do this anyway!

four jobs i've had in my life:
Sales & Marketing Engineer
Sales Engineer na lang now
Driver of my dad
baker

four movies i would watch over and over:
Clueless
Zoolander
Meet Joe Black
Hot Chick

four places i have lived:
Timbuktu
Hong Kong
Livonia
wala yun lang i want to live in NY soon

four tv shows i love to watch:
Desperate Housewives
Sex and The City
Grey's Anatomy
Prison Break

four places i have been to on vacation:
US
Paris
Bohol
Subic (ambaduuuyyy!)

four websites i visit daily:
friendster
multiply
google
MSN

four of my favorite foods:
pork sinigang super asim with gabi and kangkong
tita daisy's kaldereta
Lamb chops
the steak at Jing & Jinky's (John's cousins) place

four places i would rather be right now:
at a beach with the tali crew!
New York drinking the night away with crazy friends
my bed
King of Prussia

four people i'm going to tag:
Liza
Anna Avacena
Lovine
Mon Herbert

I love Taco Bell

2006-05-18T11:48:00.000-07:00

So here I am... last stop, Michigan.

The last time I was here was when I was 12? Or 11. That's 12-13 years ago. And it feels good to be back. I've been doing nothing but hanging out in the house the whole day, waking up at 11 in the morning and not caring about a shit. Well not really. Aside from doing work (yes I do my damn work dammit),I spent 2 days at my cousin's condo, which is pretty neat. I was a couch potato watching the whole first season of Grey's Anatomy gorging on Chocolate chip granola bars and chocolate chip cookies...

I love you doctor Sheppard.

And I've been doing a little thinking. a little soul searching. I'm about to hit 25 and here I am. At the prime of my life, about to go bankrupt. haha! With basically nothing to do but go to the mall, can you blame me?

It's good to catch up with people you haven't seen in a long time. New York was a blast. Spent 3 nights and 2 days with friends. Crazy friends. It's all good. We did go to Serendipity and I had the infamous frozen hot chocolate, which I have to say is a bit tad overrated. Think-cold ovaltine over crushed ice topped with lotsa whipped cream. If I had a sweet tooth I'd've tasted the broadway thingy. Man, I am such a tourist!

And yes, I must admit, part of me never wants to go back. But before I go TNT on you guys, of course I miss the people back home. I miss drinking (not that I've been skipping on that here, na-uh. no way. I've had my share of blue moons and Heineken light (finally) and Stella Artois, mojitos and vodka cranberries) . I miss the roussy moments. I miss my dog. I miss my family, I miss my room (well not really!), I miss my friends, I miss... the list goes on. I miss the damn heat!

But I don't want to go back to my bills. I think that' s the only thing that's making me not want to go home right now. I've had my share of retail therapy. YEAAAAH. And to think, I swore off not going shopping anymore when I was in HK. yeah right. And I will miss Taco Bell. Loved it when i was a kid and love it til now. been having 2 grande soft tacos with Mild sauce (they have the sauce I loveee here) for my midnight snacks. I'm hoarding the mild sauce alryt!

So...2 days more. It gets tiring to get thrown over the place, i hate packing!I'll be home in a bit, yes. See ya, shmuckers!

injured!

2006-04-25T23:14:00.000-07:00

funny how you can injure yourself while sleeping.

that's exactly what happened to me this morning. woke up at around 5am to go weewee when i felt this irritating pain on my right leg. the kind you get when you strain your legs walking all day.

anyway, i thought it was nothing but when i woke up it was still there! only the pain crept down to my foot, more specificallyto my achilles tendon. could barely walk.

anyway i didn't have a car today so i had to commute. i was debating with myself whether or not to go to the ER this morning or later in the afternoon.but it was so friggin' hot inside the fx so i decided to have my foot checked in the morning.

well, the doctor said i had tendonitis, this injury common to athletes.
well... athlete naman ako ah. i engage in marathons. marathon shopping walks hahaha!
he said that normally they do an MRI on the patient but since mine looked like a minor case, an x-ray would do.

i love the ER of the new Medical City. i've been to a lot of trips to the ER of the old Medical city (which is now a parking lot) and it was soooo tiny and cramped. Anyway, i don't know if i like being on a wheel chair. it makes you feel so helpless. my 90 something year old lolawould rather stay upstairs than move to the 1st floor of her house because she doesn't want to be stuck in a wheel chair.she doesn't want people to see her and say, ay ang tanda or something like that.o di ba ang taray ng lola ko!

on the way back while being wheeled to the waiting area, i saw one of my friends from highschool pa, Maite. What a shock for her to see me of all places in the freakin' ER!

anyway, so the x-ray was normal. i was prescribed mefanamic acid,had my right foot bandaged, told me to put an ice pack every now and then and told me to veer away from high heels. and avoid carrying a lot of weight.ha! and i'm leaving on sunday for the US so goodluck to me!

i hate being immobilized at this time when i have a run of errands to do.i have to go to kamuning, to shangrila and to megamall all by saturdayto get my clothes and pasalubongs for my titos,titas and cousins.

who knows if i can bring in/smuggle some Excellente Ham to the US? my tita in Sanfo's been craving for it. now i'm craving for it.

and who knows if the grayhound is ok? as in the bus...?

can't wait to get away again and mobilize my right foot again!

bad hair day.

2006-04-22T03:43:00.000-07:00

disclaimer:
This will be a 2-in-1 blog.

Today i think was a productive day for me compared to yesterday (where i did nothing but sleep, sleep and sleep).After lunch I drove to Kamuning to have pants done and see if my tailor could make me a nice suit to go with the other pair of pants I had copied and altered...with my size (-1 or 0) it's impossible to find something that ACTUALLY FITS, so whenever I score some clothes, I would have to purchase them or have shopping nightmares that would haunt me for all eternity. Luckily, for shoes, I am blessed to have a normal shoe size.

ANYWAY, after that, I went to my salon, Piandre, to get a trim. My hair was sooo long already and I could see the split ends surfacing (eeek)na. I've been going to that Salon since 2004 and found a good hairstylistin Marlon (who,I just found out last December, is not gay).

Unfortunately, he's been relocated to the Alabang branch. So I asked for the one who replaced him to cut my hair instead.HOLY CRAP.I was explaining to him that I wanted to have a trim (5 inches off the length)and to have my hair a bit layered to add some volume. My hair is supah straight and needs a whole lotta body at times.

ANYWAY, so he starts snipping away...and the process seemed to go on for eternity. i think he kinda noticed i was getting a bit anxious and he asked me, "hindi naman kayo nagmamadali di ba?", to which i smile sweetly and said,"hindi naman". pero shetterz. ang tagal! he was cuttingfor around almost an hour. anyway, viola.

i think he cut 5 inchess off EVERYWHERE.

my hair is so freakin short! I was discussing having a haircut ala Nicole Ritchie with Joes one time but was having second thoughts about it. this was not what i wished for. I don't want to post any pictures of my new haircut. good thing ill be leaving next week and will be away for 3 weeks haha. i hope my hair sucks up all the pro-vitamins in pantene for it to GRRROOOOWWW away!!!

my hair looks like agot isidro's bob cut, slightly layered and with bangs.basta.umoo na lang kayo.
i don't know how in the world i'd be fixing my hair. short hair has always been THE HIGH MAINTENANCE of all hairdos.dammit.

=================
Blog that should have been posted last April 19,2006:

all i want to do right now is go home and sleep.for hours and hours and hours or years or for all eternity until my prince charming wakes me up with a kiss from my deep slumber.i just hope i wake up without the dark circles under my eyes.anyway, im counting the hours til i get out of this cubicle.i am going to look like a freakin Christmas tree in the middle of summer later. i have so much to carry! and the dimwits evenwanted to let me bring home this suitcase for me to bring to the US for the tradeshow this May. WTF!!!

i am so proud of myself for having successfully packed my stuff in my teeny weenie luggage. my clothes look like spring rolls now.that is what you call the art of packing. if i were to assess if this trip was productive, i'd say, so-so.what i loved the most about this was that i was able to see a good friend of mine from highschool, Nadine. The first time i went to Hong Kong she was here too! But we only got to spend the afternoon together. This time, it was 2 days offull time shop til you drop at Causeway Bay and TST, particularly at Granville.Haha! Kudos to Fong for patiently waiting for us while we rummaged through the different stores to find our scores.

Taking a break from shopping along Granville

They were looking forever for this restaurant called Spring Deer.Spring Deer is famous for its Peking duck. yum yum yum! We ordered wayyy tooo mucch food for the 3 of us. Nadine was craving forSweet and sour pork, Fong was craving for sharksfin soup and peking duck and i just suggested shrimp balls and yang chow fried rice. We could've fed 6 people with what we ordered. After that of course we checked out the Esprit Outlet store again to do more shopping. I got another jacket (to brace myself for San Fo weather).We had to extremely go weewee and we couldn't even think of any other place nearby but the Peninsula Hotel (which was just across the street) to go pee.Love the place. If I were to have my honeymoon in Hong Kong, I'd love to stay there.(But I don't want my honeymoon to be in Hong Kong bwaha.)
Anyway, my flight got super delayed. it was supposed to depart from HK at 740pmbut because of the stupid runway construction at the NAIA,we left HK at around 9pm instead.I think NAIA only has 2 runways, and the other one as mentioned will be under construction until July, if I'm not mistaked. Sooo, more flights delayed!
========================

It's good to be back home, although I haven't really unpacked. Need to figure out how many suitcases to bring for 3 weeks.
Last week was such a blur... This week will be hell week. Have to settle my finances and shit!
I know I still have stuff to say but my mind has gone blank.
boohoo!

disconnected

2006-04-13T03:38:00.000-07:00

i left my celfone at home and i just realized that when we were onthe bus already on our way to work. nothing to fret about, im sure i'll be seeing a blinking green light anyway later.

got lost at yau ma tei yesterday. for some reason i was made to believe i was in mongkok and led my comrades to the way where i thought the train station was.
oops. my bad.

i'm getting my day off this Sunday! Wow. asteeg. Sunday pa talaga eh noh.And fortunately, Monday is a public holiday too. I want to go to Disneyland but I don't think I'll be able to get someone to go with me.Hongkongers hate mainlanders and Disney's the place to get jiggy with the tour groups and all.Or probably visit that big-ass Buddha too. I'm hoping Nadine's game for this.

My colleagues are planning this barbecue for tonight. BBQ. I have no idea where it's going to be and i don't think they have the least bit idea that it's raining! Well, it's been raining since last nightand it's pretty cool outside. Of course, I had to leave my camera at home!(and my f*cking fone)
-----
*It's going to be at Sai Kung (or somethinglike that) by the beach. SOMEWHERE.

The dimwits didn't tell us we could wear jeans today, and so of course I'm clad in slacks and longsleeves. But good move on my part, I'm wearing my sneaks.Black suede puma speed cats rule!

I'm dreading Saturday afternoon when i have to meet not one, but 2 Koreans!
SHET.Sorry i don't mean to sound racist but it has something to do with friends back homewho have this notion of Koreans as KOREYANOS (say it with
me now), spikey funky hair,weird looking and just uhm, weird.

I don't have have a rat's ass of what to expect too and I'm hoping discussionswon't get too technical and i'm hoping they can't speak english that well too so that if I can't understand them, i'll just have to smile, grin and say,I'LL SEND YOU AN EMAIL!

Wow. I'll be disconnected from the world and be back online come Tuesday.I'm feeling a bit sad now...it seems that days are going by just soooo fast.Parang I don't want to go home.Parang I want to stay here.ALONE.
But maybe I need them to ship my dog.

HOORAY FOR THE WEEKEND!

HAPPY EASTER!

Steppin' Out...

2006-04-11T21:41:00.000-07:00

my head is in a whirlwind.
i am stuck in an all too familiar place again, literally and figuratively.only this time, new characters have been added to the thinning plot.

why did i have to be thrown into isolation while everyone is home, having fun?
not that i'm complaining...but maybe i am, of course i am.what's new?
i am in hong kong for the holy week, and will be working my ass off at the peakof the holiday, from good friday til monday. and when i get back, i don't even have time to rest, nor leaves to spare as i barely have enough left.

i hate it. i hate to be stuck in a rut with nothing else to think about but the trail i left behind.
i hate how it's affecting every little bit of me, in all aspects.
i hate how i am not a better person because of this whole shithole i got myself into.
i hate how i became this indecisive person, dragging myself out of bed just to get the day over with.

yes, in the baduyest of all terms to relate how i feel,i probably lost my mojo.

let me be the tramp you think i am, but i am just really one confused soul.really.

maybe i thought i could have it all... maybe i thought i could have my piece and eat it too.
since that was what they were doing anyway.
but as the cliche goes, you can't have it all.you can NEVER have it all.

anyway, a little pinch of reality:
yesterday, i got lost in Ikea wandering about the lamps and lanterns and shades of all shapes and sizes. i wish i could have my own little ikea. to step in and out of, occassionally.i mean, i feel like i've been in this endless quest of opening doors, why not put some flair and decor to make it more enjoyable? whoopeedoo. i could definitely live in Ikea.seriously.

lesson learned: know your comrades' celfone numbers-- at least the ones that are working, to avoid window shopping/shopping delays. time is precious.

i just realized what side of Hong Kong our new office is located. for quite some time now,i've been thinking, where the hell is Kowloon Bay? yesterday, i surmised, it's just a place a shade shadier than Kowloon side, Tsim Sha Tsui to you voyagers.
Of course not your typical Central but as long as you're a train ride away from shopping havens(at least for me) like Mongkok and TST, plus you have one big-ass shopping mall next door to conquer ,you're good to go. Oh! This is also where the Mother MTR station's located.

lesson learned: be in your comfiest foot wear, marathon shopping calls and i'd rather be prepared than suffer a foot full of calluses and sport ACL on both knees.

i am starving LITERALLY and FIGURATIVELY.stomach grumbling, i can only gulp a mouthful of air for what lies ahead.

FEED THE HUNGRY!

fools like me.

2006-04-05T21:11:00.000-07:00

i think i will always be one. my realization for today.

anyway, as they say, you can't have it all.
but you're not cut out to settle but oftentimes you end up doing so,
to keep your sanity in tact perhaps?

and yes, chivalry is dead... or so.. as i'm made to believe.
(this statement to open up a heated debate to be tackled in another blog soon)

you get caught up in the moment but as the momentum slows down
and the blurry whirlwind comes to a halt...
you find yourself there... your moment of clarity.
do you drift along with it, or oppose?

but ... to what extent?

it isn't funny anymore. i'm not having fun anymore, that's for sure.
make a stand, let me know. don't go around in circles.
stop running around my head, i can't keep up anymore.
i can't go chasing forever.

TAG. you're IT.

Hed Kandi

2006-03-31T21:38:00.000-08:00

Okay call me a LATE BLOOMER, but last night was the first time I went to a HED KANDI event. I'd like to call it an event and not a concert because:

1. The term concert, is just plain weird. I guess maybe because we associate this to live performances (singing acts, bands, etc.) Whilethis calls for DJ's spinning endless tracks and show girls dancing non-stop you'd wonder if it was really Red Bull they were on.

2.Event is more appropriate to help hype things up. I'm going to the Hed Kandi Concert VS. I'm going to the Hed Kandi EVENT (with emphasis of course, on the word EVENT).

3. Although, later on, I did get the gist of why it was called a concert-it was like the elements of light and sound were all incorporated to deliver one great shebang, that is, only, Hed Kandi.

4. Of course it just hit me now that most probably when Hed Kandi goes on a tour elsewhere in Europe, the artists are probably there too? WoW. Kaya concert.Ooooh.

Anyway, back to last night's events. Got to the venue, the World Trade Center in Roxas at around10-ish. We thought it was going to be inside the WTC per se, until I saw this big-ass tarpolineposter that said - Happy Birthday Gorgeous Rose (or some shit like that). It was inside the tentpala. I pity the owners of the cars parked around the perimeter of the tent-- they probably had to jumpstart their cars at around 4am to get home as their alarms kept on going off blending to the beat. Luckily, the place where we parked was safe.

Fast forward... PHP500 bucks was the entrance ticket and when our friend gave me the ticket, I was like, uhm.. "yan na yun." ? It was a red strip of paper (well, color-coded actually to determineif you were part of the VIP section or not) with adhesive on the tip to act as a makeshiftbracelet. I was looking forward to a more fancy elaborate ticket to keep as my souvenir however the bracelet did make some sense later on in the night. When we got inside, medyo nilalangaw pa. But okay na rin coz we got our table. Come 12am, there was already a thick crowd, although in my point-of-view, the size was not what they were projecting it to be.
I guess it was a great venue to go people watching. Nevermind that those in the VIP section behind us were all broke back mountaineers. I will never forget that gay dude who wore a striped pink and neon green shirt. Wow. galing. pwede na siya mag light show mag-isa.bwahaha.It was the place to probably go all-out glam. Okay, glam siguro but not really all-out glam, not unlessyou'd want to be identified as one of the Kandi girls dancing onstage. BUT, I'm glad I came in the right Kandi attire. Sorry, the jologs I am, I did not bring my camera. It would've been better if I did because I did see a couple of friends whom I haven't been in contact with for ages!

Galing galing galing the lights!!! Although I would've really appreciated it if..hehe..*wink*
Anton Ramos' spins were steady, but we couldn't help notice the sablays in the entries of his mixes.Oh well. Come Hed Kandi time, we were all waiting for familiar tunes( not fucking Ever After, puhleaze!). They did play a couple Beach House stuff (we were expecting more of these) but medyo trancy music too. I guess gusto nilang tapatan ang Tiesto.

Big Fish does know how to throw a great party. Although we could not help but think why the name Big Fish.Kasi magaling silang mangbingwit ng pera. bwahahaha! A can of San Mig Light at a hundred bucks, mineral water which usually costs 10-20 bucks were jacked up to 70-80 bucks. WHUT!!!

I have never exprerienced such intense body heat! ANG INIIT! I think I lost like 10 pounds sweating like a pig while dancing all out. WOooooh! Too bad for this girl who passed out and had to be dragged out by her friends and have everyone check out her ass in the process. So, girlies, don't wear flowy skirts!!!

The night would've been perfect if I got the damn CD. Come 2am, we went in front of the DJ's to see what the hype was all about. The DJ's were throwing out cd's! I swear to God the DJ threw it to mydirection because we did make eye contact and he told the other DJ to throw it to me. Of course, out of nowhere this ASSHOLE snatches it from my hand. And i was like, okay you can have it dammit I'll justask for another one. EH WALA NA ! I swear, I am too nice, next time I'd step on whoever triesto get in my way so that I can make good use of my stilletos. Anyway, John got one so, good for him.And tough luck to me.

I missed dancing like crazy!!! What a way to destress! I did take some pictures with my uh, SQH2O O2 fone.So bear with the resolutions. And *TRIED* to get a video clip too.
I am definitely a late Hed Kandi bloomer (boohooo) (I can see eyes rolling and brows arching). Nevertheless, better late than never. So... Kudos to my friends who've influenced me with good steady vibes music. Ohh! They did play a Kaskade song so my night was somehow made already. Kudos to friends who would like to try something silly like going to these event/concerts for the heck of it, and kudos to Big Fish for throwing a mothaf@cK%n parteee!

carnival rides

2006-02-26T20:05:00.000-08:00

so i was thinking, i wanted to get off the roller-coaster for a change.
try another ride.
do i go on the ferris wheel or resign myself to being the crash test dummy on the bump cars?

i wanted to set out to a new adventure with no one telling me where to go or what to do.
i just wanted someone to hold my hand through the wholebruhahas.
but, what to do, when that hand lets that grip slip?
find someone to give you a pat on the back instead.

i definitely am in love with Scotch 7.

Happy Valentine's Day!

2006-02-14T01:44:00.000-08:00

Happy Hearts' Day to everyone!

Just a quick entry!

I was made to believe I'd be dreading this red letter-heart plasteredday but noooo!
Surprises started coming in as early as 11pm last night...big surprise when I woke up this morning. And yes, I have a date! Hahaha, before gasping or raising your eyebrows just yet, I have a date with my beloved cousin. We made a pact to be each other's dates this day. So sorry na lang sa mga naunahan. lol ;p
I'm thankful that although this year was off to a somewhat bad start,I'm learning and recovering from all the emotional roller-coaster shit of last year.To my friends, thanks for making me feel extra special today! =) Flowers and chocolates may be so passe, but whatever to that, giddy is the way to go today!

halleerrrrrrrrh!

2006-02-07T19:43:00.000-08:00

i was meaning to post something to usher in 2006 but i did not feel like writing something Jan 1. and kung hei fat choy is now long past.

BUT! let me do my first post (at least here) with something positive.

SLAP ME SILLY,
BUT i am the giddiest girl in the world.
i haven't felt this way in a long (WAY LONG!) time.and i almost forgot how good it feels.
i just want to hang on to this indefinitely. (yes, to infinity and beyond!)

and i'm really digging Kylie Minogue right now!

booze a jolt of redbull and good company = panalo!

goodbye 2005! hello 2006!

2005-12-31T06:58:00.000-08:00

I cannot believe that in just an hour 2005 will be officially over.
This year was probably the toughest one for me, especially with 1 more hurrah of a kamalasan that has been conveniently trailing me since the past week.
I cannot blog that much,as I am pressed for time (need to bake something in 30 mins), but I can really say that I am so relieved that this year is soon going to be over and done with! If you want something deep, I suggest you read my buddy Cheeky Mon's blog.

Yes, this year has been my "quarter-life" crisis year. So many things happened and I thank God for the moments and experiences and people I've met, friends I got re-aqcuainted with.
In the coming year, I would like to make a pledge to become a better person (how cliche), and be more positive. I don't want to be a scrooge anymore but I cannot assure you it'll be 24/7 as I'm sure I'd have my "topak" moments every now and then.

2006 is all about change, and as the song goes, Change is GOOD!

Happy New Year !!!

miss scrooge

2005-12-19T22:13:00.000-08:00

warning: this one's full of angst. (what's new!!!)

dreading the weekend... i feel like such a scrooge. I'm not even excited about anything.

yes, the past week was just the ultimate HELL. I can't believe December is just passing me by. Yes I've been doing some retail therapy but I have to admit that I'm more of a giver this time of the year. Well might as well give and give to myself anyway. arrrrgh. it's been 2 days... if i can train myself a little bit more.

boohoo! i've been a crappy, troubled child eager for a soulful connection this year. i've been flattered left and right, but what good does flattery dowhen you get to the core of what you're trying to get to?

if YOU'RE reading this, i want you to know that YOU made me feel the ugliest this year!!!

here's to f*ckin' a$&h@l%$!!!!

diddlysquat

2005-12-13T02:37:00.000-08:00

this entry was inspired by donnah's WANTS.

i remember an old friend of mine saying im like a pendulum (not literally, stupid.) with my situation -- been here, been that.

have i met THE ONE and in some screwed up way fate twists things, my sanity and could have let him slip away? is my THE ONE lurking around waiting for theright moment to strike? Like dons, when I realize that moment, I want everything to go hazy and people diminished to a blur, with just the two of us standing right smack in the middle, cameras zooming in.androse petals (white and red) showering from up above. and the moment, heaven forbid, to be sealed, in the cliche of all cliches...a kiss. soft, slow, tender, with love emanating everywhere, (rays of light now, light's person)sending tingles to my spine.

One thing's for sure though, I don't want to settle !

And holy crap. what the hell was that about?!

I am officially, officially, experiencing quarter-life crisis. I know, like Ther, I should not settle. There are 18 days left of this damn hell of a year it has been. And as I reflect, (oh boy what reflections!) I know I've got to get my ass moving and quit slugging along. But please, cut me some slack and let me linger, soak in whatever fulfilling self-indulgent bad vibes beforeI let go.
Somehow, I have this secret wish of Ashton Kutcher appearing out of nowhere (at 11:59 p.m. of the 31st of December 2005)telling me I got Punk'd.

holy crap.

2006, let's be better.

Holy Crap!

2005-12-02T00:10:00.000-08:00

I got the break that I have looong wanted over the weekend! Nothing but sheer good,clean fun with friends I haven't seen in quite a long time. Plus, throw in the sun, the beach and some beachy couture some gin & juice and good old trusty Miguel, Marl and Winston, Joey's Elle and People magazines, and paparazzis and camwhores like me, what have you got? PURE BLISS!
Some insights this weekend:
Laughter is THE BEST MEDICINE. Especially if:
1. You're at your EXCORSHUN
2. The phytochemist Cyrus Almuranas is on board
3. You are labeled as : Rosy Joyce (when everyone elsehas been calling you by your first name the whole freaking day!)
4. You're sippin on Gin and Juice (lay back, with my mind on my money and my money on my mind!!!)
5. Somebody tells you you look like you're lactating & it's disturbing
6. Ther lays a peck on your cheek every so often you either feel loved or violated!
7. You accumulate 500 (or so) pictures and you're in about 80% of them (haha!)
8. You meet fat kids who throw insults at themselves such as :
a. " andito na si taba!" (the speaker being fat himself)
b. a fat kid is named Poknut and his friends keep shouting --anak ka ng poknut!
c. a fat kid making pilit his fat pomeranian to take a dip
d. a bodyguard telling the fat kid to have his pomeranian as their pulutan (Gawin na nating pulutan yan!)

9. You are mooned by one big plump fresh piece of ass (HAHA!) covered pink poison studded shorts

Hahaha! I got mooned!

Here fatty fatty!

10. You listen to 80's and beerhouse music during the afternoon, random boyband tunes (yes, BSB, Nsync & 98 Degrees are the best!)all day, plus hard core rage music and good old gangsta music whenever and have KING OF WISHFUL THINKING on repeat mode!
11. You have an underwater camera to continue your camwhore moments
12. You get a nosebleed moment because of some conyo mestizo dude whose kid has a personal photographer, a body guard, a yaya and someone to lather some sunblock on his back
13. You let the waves carry you off to the shore
14. Cy and his Borgy moments
15. You're having breakfast with GUS! (hee Hi Gus if you're reading this!)

Alternatively, it is not cool when:
1. You run out of booze and lights are off even before 12 midnight! (ok lang at least we all had a hearty breakfast the next day c/o Manang [Gus if you're reading this, ipipirate ko na si Manang ha] and we were able to enjoy the sun and sand a while longer)
2. People horde their yosi (uuuy aminin ayaw mag-share ng iba nung gabi na! ;p )
3. Sea insects bite you
4. It drizzles a bit (even just for a while) while you're sprawled out, DYING to get a TAN!
5. something unhooks/snaps!
6. Your Ipod resets... to NOTHING!
7. People from work hound you with phone calls
8. You accidentally sip stale gin thinking it was water... at freakin 3 am!
9. Some kupal dude shows up and has the guts to tell you -- sinusundan niyo ata kami ah!
10. Everything you want on the menu is out of stock.
** yeah well they miraculously came up with hot choco and chicken cannolini (? uhm tama ba)11. It's so freaking traffic on the way home

Wow Chicks!

We Love Miguel!

Nothing but Blue Skies...

Camwhoring !

First timers!

Family Pic

Bliss.

I love you boys and girls for the really really GREAT time we had! Til next (month!) Time ... no flaking... no crying !!!

Republic of Joylet.

2005-11-23T19:05:00.000-08:00

Yes, money CAN buy happiness. I am, of course, referring to Retail Therapy.
You should try it out one time, it DOES do wonders for a rather routine couch-potato-like office work week.

I seriously think I have ADD at work. As in. S-T-R-U-G-G-L-E !

Can't wait for the weekend! I hear it's going to be a blast. No flaking!

Thanks Therbee for this. Command and Conquer. Together friends, we can rule the world!

slugging along.

2005-11-10T23:27:00.000-08:00

the day has rather been off to a sluggish start. kept snoozing and snoozing until it was really freaking time to get up (9am).And, as useless, was late for work. i hate this new policy of having to round off the timeyou get in the office to the nearest quarter-hour (wait lang wrong grammar ata yun), becauseour admin's complaining that it's TOO MUCH WORK (really) to compute the exact time... ugh. anyway, i guess there's our motivation to go to work earlier. it just sucks, having to include saturdays(which everyone treats as slacker days)to this stupid adamant rule.

anyway, what a depressing week. (what's new). i was so disturbed about the shooting incident at ortigas last monday. Anton, the driver of the car,was one of my brother's friends. And my brother was hanging out at oysterboy last monday, roughly a minute's drive away from the crime scene. how young. he just had his debut. and this morning, my cousin's wife passed away. im guessing she's in her mid 30's. and they have 3 little kids... how to cope, how to deal? she's been in and out of the hospital for quite some time now. was confined earlier because of pneumonia, then back again because of an allergic reaction to the antibiotics she was taking...and the rest is just a series of complications. they say death usually comes in 3's. i'm guessing the third one is Dumbledore.

depressing but a surprisingly fast week. days seem to go by so fast. it's just hitting me now that it's going to be a cold, cold,cold december.

there are times i really wish i were a guy...just so i don't have to be so damn emotional. but how do you guys do it anyway? deadma, i mean. a friend of mine told me over beer and yosi that the only weapon of guys is their pride. how dumbfoundingly true (duh).

but as they say, life goes on. i'm still dazed though and keep lugging at a snail's pace, but yet tweaking with eagerness to find out what tomorrow's loot will be.

i need to go out more.friends, let's hook up!

Tagged by Ther!

2005-11-01T23:28:00.000-08:00

I'm experiencing a very sluggish day today and it doesn't help when someone peers over your shoulder every now and then.Talk about daily nuisances!

Anyway, I'm glad that even though the day is rolling out at a snail's pace, Therbee tagged me! So here's 20 random things about me.
1. I have LSS - Last Subo Syndrome. Meaning when the amount of food on my plate is reduced to just a spoonful, I completely lose my appetite.
2. I get sleepy when I drink coffee.
3. I smoke but don't like getting "smoked" at. i.e., ayoko ng binubugahan ng yosi.
4. I love watching The O.C. and One Tree Hilland Desperate Housewives. They make my Mondays and Tuesdays complete.
5. I hate Physics and Chemistry. But actually liked Calculus at some point.
6. I hate how my weight is yo-yo like. I hate being thin. I can't buy all the clothes I like!
7. I wear SPF60 sunblock on my face everyday.
8. I hate BJORK!
9. When I'm depressed, I resort to yosi diet.
10. I'm so freaking scared of being an old maid. I'm 24. I wanna get married by age 27.
11. I have a queen-sized bed with my sleeping space reduced to a single coz the other half's occupied by books, bags, magazines and other junk I sleep with.
12. I think I've transformed into a ditz.(Or I think people think I'm such a ditz sometimes).
13. When I was a kid, I loved sports. Now, I don't play any sport for fear of losing whatever FAT I have stored in my body.
14. I ultimately loathe people who talk to themselves and laugh all of a sudden when there isn't anything funny going on at all (I can name one I'm really irritatingly annoyed at right now!).
15. I fall for the tall, dark and handsome chinito-types with nice noses *SIGH*
16. I would like to experience total freedom even just once, without anybody telling me what to do, or what not to do.
17. I hate white light. I look so ugly under white light.
18. I wish I had my own car, unlimited gas so I can go wherever. It'd be easier to keep in touch with friends that way.
19. I hate being polite. I find it hard to be plastic. If I hate you I hate you, If I like you, I like you and if I love you, I'll spoil you to death.
20. I hate having to make big decisions. I'm scared I might not be able to handle the outcome later on.

roller coaster-taxi rides

2005-10-16T23:27:00.000-07:00

i am so puzzled!

i've been trying to connect the dots eversince another thing was revealed to me last weekend. i was never a big fan of liars. although i admit, i've had my share of little white lies. however, the end still does not justify the means.
if i could, i think i'd join the CIA sometime. my friend thinks i have a promising career. i don't even have to ask for it..most of the time, things have a way of revealing themselves to me. another eye-opener or mind-boggler? take your pick. i choose both.

ever been in a situation where somebody told you a fat lie, and in the end, you find out the truth...reprimand an explanation from them, accept, then later on shelve it as full of crap? a handful of excuses. arrrgh! i'm getting sick of the chase. i might not be able to handle the detours any longer. might have to press that EJECT button soon...! or take the exit to the freeway...

anyway, last Saturday, i trekked over to Rockwell. Haven't been there in the longest time! I checked out the newly opened ZARA store. Now we don't have to head over to Hong Kong (or elsewhere in Europe) to get Zara stuff anymore ! Not a lot of stuff for the guys, as the season's collection really focused on Fall/Winter. Surprisingly though, the Zara store here is considerably bigger than the one at IFC. Oh! And they have a teens section too! It was funny to see people walking around Rockwell toting the latest designer paper bag must-have - the signature blue ZARA bag. Mango is up for some big competition. Ratio of blue:white paperbags that weekend = 10:1!
As for me, I'm happy with my ZA Girls khakhi's circa fall/winter 2004...hee!

I feel exhausted and it's only the start of the week! Almost didn't wake up for work today. Got out of bed at freaking 8:49! Good thing I had my fingerprint scanned on time-- 9:58 am. sheesh!

I am such a loner at our work station this week! Everyone else got deported to HK for the newbie training and Karen and Tin for their 2 1/2 months training. Ohh,what fun these kids are gonna have!

All I'm longing for is a weekend getaway to Bohol. How I'd get there on time I'd have to cross my fingers. I'm expecting flights to be fully booked already.
Just want to soak up the sun,chill and relax.

I love my cousin Alyn for taking me out last Friday with her friends. They're soo funny! But it looks like we aren't gonna be showing our faces at Oysterboy anytime soon.. hahah! I'm gonna miss their peach rhum so baad.

Oh to get tipsy and carefree. I'm counting on the days...

mis amigas -- Peach rhum converts

A Sorta Fairytale

2005-10-11T21:19:00.000-07:00

call me a late bloomer or something but I just found out the lyrics to Tori Amos' A Sorta Fairytale song. You know how some artists are kinda bulol when they sing? I really liked the tune and told myself I'd search for the lyrics on the net. SHIT. It's so saaad pala =( !!!

I could totally relate. Hay nako. for those of you still clueless, go figure.
I like how artists like Sarah Mchlachlan and Tori Amos write songs with catchy tunes. I've been listening to Sarah Mclachlan eversince her Fumbling Towards Ecstasy album came out (that was me, circa Grade 6). I hated it though when Building a Mystery and Angel, and Adia (and more songs of hers like Ice Cream to extent) became Mainstream.
That was when she came back actively to the music scene (me, circa 3rd year Highschool, I think!).

I love the lyrics to their songs. I'd rather listen to them anytime rather than listen to angsty (teenage angsty, that is) Avril Lavigne! Sorry but when I'm down and depressed I get really sappy, sometimes get filled up with rage but not like miss skaterrrboi.No offense to those who love and adore her.

I am bored and bothered, scared yet excited about what the future brings.
Have you ever felt whole and broken at the same time? The feeling is mutual.

Last week was just a bad week I guess. We lost to FEU. I guess that was our "karma".
Plus I also had an "epiphany". Just because things aren't THE SAME anymore doesn't give you an excuse to treat people certain ways.

ENOUGH.

Some tidbits about the current fave song playing on my shuffle this time:
"[Scarlet's] in love at that point," she explained,
"and [the couple is] taking that classic trip up [Highway] 101 and [Highway] 1
on their way to San Francisco, and they cut off because they are having the trip of their life, and they go out West to the Southwest. And that's where the masks come down for them. Who they thought each other was is not who they really are.
It's one of those things where it's not about not having enough love for each other,
it's just that you don't know why you can't make it work.
You don't know how you are losing each other and you're sitting right in front of each other in plain view,but you can't seem to make it work. And that's why it's a 'sort of' fairy tale,because she wasn't a princess."
--Tori; MTV.com News, 09/23/02

I thought for some time, I was a princess too.

Anyway, commercial muna:
Souk Gallery presents " Open for Inspiration"
Photographs + Paintings by Alfredo Mendoza & Pia Rivera.
Exhibit runs til October 27.
Souk Gallery is at the 2/F, Crescent Building,
San Miguel Avenue, Ortigas Center, Pasig City.

beautiful

2005-09-28T02:29:00.000-07:00

I've always been that person who likes to take charge. I don't know if it's because of how I was brought up or just my innate nature, or maybe because of that "middle child syndrome". I can be a controlling condescending person too and a handful at being a perfectionist. In this journey of "self-realization", I guess I'm learning it the hard way.And like my friend Geens said -- "it's not the fall that's the issue it's getting back on." I just hate to be the one to say "I told you so". So now I guess the better thing to do is to keep mum. But it still doesn't mean I don't give a damn, although there are some days I just wish i didn't.

**current theme song as of the moment: **
Beautiful - Nine Days
You're beautiful, just like Mary's son,
You spin around me like the Earth to the Sun...
And everything is a word I need,
Because without it I'm just like a disease
Slowly fading...

Could it be that you want more than your place in the Sun?
Could it be you've reached the end and you've only begun?
I will not waste my time here,I will not waste my life here,
Waiting for you...

You're beautiful unlike anyone,
And Like a whisper and a breeze you were gone.
You're everything that the heart would sing,
And now without you I'm just like a disease,Slowly fading...

You were faded,
Overrated,
But you're beautiful this time...

Could it be that you were more than your place in the sun?
Could it be you've reached the end and you've only begun?
I will not waste my time here...
Cuz' you're faded,Overrated,
Cuz' you're beautiful this time...
You're so beautiful this time...
Yes you're beautiful this time...Y
You're so beautiful...

STARE!

2005-09-26T02:19:00.000-07:00

Stoner Bear

Boohoo. Haha! This is what major boredom does !

Which Dysfunctional Care Bear Are You?
brought to you by Quizilla

mister big shot

2005-09-18T19:46:00.000-07:00

a friend of mine sent me this mp3 of Claire Bradey's song (sino ka?!) . Couldn't help but think of it as the appropriate title for my blog.

Despite all the drama I found time to focus my energy to pay homage to my alma mater. Basketball has been one of my favorite sports and what better way to spend a rainy, depressing Thursday? Watch the Green Archers crush the Blue Eaglets..ay Eagles pala! bwahahaha (despite Yeo's panggugulo) !

Also yesterday, we proved to UE that despite the rematch, we could still beat them, tambak din (despite Tang and Arana's olatzs performance) ! May pa-banner banner pa sila na : UE Lumalaban ng Parehas (or something like that)... .uhm, Karen if you're reading my blog... NO OFFENSE! PEACE TAYO heehee !

So now my dear bloggertsz I leave you with my favorite pic -- (thanks to my bro)

high and dry.

2005-09-16T08:04:00.000-07:00

funny how a sudden burst of outrage changes the course of history.
i have never felt so close yet so far in my whole life. could this be my wake-up call?
so many obstacles, so many hindrances. too many pillars and walls, too many hurdles.
not so far away a soul cries for this to all stop, to give up the fight. do i concede? should i concede? maybe tomorrow. too distant from now.

i admire people who can make a stand for what they really want. who hate to be confused. who refuse to be sucked in the whirlpool, who would rather paddle away from the waves.

self-control. is there such? or are we just trying too hard. . . i have to remind myself to breathe.

i hate how i get my hopes up when i hear the phone ringing. thinking. wishing. hoping. this is all but a nightmare i have gotten myself into. learning to be adamant when deep inside i will crumble, i will stumble.

is forever a lie ? how did i ever get to become so needy? THIS needy? (banging my head on the wall now!)

stupid.

2005-09-12T22:05:00.000-07:00

yo soy muy tonto!

nicotine is my best friend. drowning, floating... in limbo.

Stupid
Night lift up the shades let in the brilliant light of morning
But steady me now for I am weak and starving for mercy
Sleep has left me alone to carry the weight of unraveling where we went wrong
And all I can do to hang on, to keep me from falling into old familiar shoes
How stupid could I be
a simpleton could see that youre no good for me but youre the only one I see
Love has made me a fool set me on fire and watched as I floundered
unable to speak except to cry out and wait for your answer and you come around in your time speaking of fabulous places create an oasis that dries up as soon as youre gone
you leave me here burning in this desert without you
Everything changes everything falls apart
I cant stand to feel myself losing control
In the deep of my weakness I know

GO FIGURE.

Blast from the Past.

2005-08-22T02:23:00.000-07:00

I wasn't able to post this when I was supposed to coz I was thinking I need to post some pics. But the blog's long over-due so I guess I have no choice but to post (DUH.)

Monday August 22, 2005
I am currently "floating". I took anti-histamine meds yesterday afternoon and I just really hate the "hang-over" I get from it-- that same old bangag feeling you get from taking Tylenol PM's.
Anyway, last Saturday was really fun! It was a pseudo-high school reunion, c/o Miss Birthday Girl and upcoming fashion designer, Maita Fernandez! It was nice to hang out with Bea and Donnah, catch up a bit and laugh the night away. Of course, there were camwhore moments, and the usual analysis of tv series (it has evolved from Dawson's Creek to One Tree Hill!), although the love life subject was not elaborately discussed. Enough of those parties where you get so drunk you spill your heart and eyes out. hmm... well, at least for me!

Virgos

Thursday, August 25, 2005
STRESSIEST (okay I think I'm inventing my adjectives here..) work day EVER! Customer does not want to agree with payment terms, we make a firm stand (as instructed by management) and what do I get back in return? A WAY ANGRY EMAIL! Plus, false accusations! Grrrr talaga!
I just hope this issue will be resolved SOON and am crossing my fingers next time I talk to my customer (he's actually one of my favorite customers to talk to) , everything's cool, calm and collected (THINK-- selective amnesia!)

Friday, August 26, 2005
Donskidoodledoo and Ate Hannah's birthday. I gotta give it up to their parents for their family planning haha!

I'm getting hooked to MAGIC SING XTREME! Videoke was never better. Plus, singing my lungs out with the help of my cousin Alyn's SONY GRAND Wega, is just like.no.other !
I love the updated song selections, crooning to Vanessa William's CONSTANTLY (not Nina's!) to crazy 80's hits and screaming my head off to Whitney Houston to Michelle Branch hits, what a way to release all the stress!

It was fun too reminiscing to the silly crazy stuff we cousins did as kids while sippin home made Kahlua (yez!). We had this exclusive club, TTA (go figure what it stands for) whose main purpose was to OUT my brother! HAHAH! We even had stupid rules like THOU SHALT NOT SAY BAD WORDS EXCEPT FOR SHAME AND SHIT. WTF?! hahahha!

What a week. Can't believe I'm turning 24 in 4 freakin' days!

7 for Mankind.

2005-08-19T01:09:00.000-07:00

All for a huff and a puff.
As I was waiting for an FX earlier this week going to work, I came a cross this guy, a bit taong grasa-ish but not quite 100% yet. Anyway, he was walking towards my direction, semi-siga. I was a bit nervous I'd run into trouble in broad daylight. Anyway, so I finally hailed an FX. As we were moving, I was blankly staring at the window and I noticed the guy I ran into walked quite a distance. I saw him pick up a used half-consumed cigarette, approach a guy smoking to probably get a light. And that dude, bless his soul, gave the guy a brand new stick.
Share the love.

Fast forward to last night. Aboard the back portion of the FX (yes, I'm a daily commuter! bringing a car to work [gas +parking] will make my wallet dry as the Sahara), 3 ladies were talking about how stressful their work is. I could really relate. Overworked and underpaid, one of them quipped. I could only muster a grin listening to them chat away.

I was supposed to get myself my birthday gift yesterday. I met with a friend who was selling them.Had to fit the jeans right? Got the jeans from the condo of this former child actor who used to love roller blading. And met this blonde action star/student/former GMIKero who cooks really well (according to a friend), who even offered us to sample his cooking. Sorry, we weren't really hungry yet.

Anyway, the jeans didn't fit. It was a size too big to be called a 25. And Honey and I were a bit Star-Struck!

Pic for the week, playing around with Photoshop. Rasterize!

Honey Frio Mixx!

Honey's last day today at work... (ay second to the last pala!) Honey Lemon we will miss you!

Editorial

2005-08-07T23:04:00.000-07:00

Okay so maybe Ocean Park isn't as damn great as Hong Kong Disneyland should be.
(Is there a BIG difference from the Original Disneyland at California?!?)
Nevertheless it was something that compensated the weeks of going to the same
destinations.It's such a cliche thing to do... but I guess a 3-month stay wouldn't be complete
if you haven't been to Ocean Park, right? (or I may be wrong...the next 3-month stint wouldn't be complete if you don't get to visit Hong Kong Disneyland). Like a giddy child, of course I was game to go! Besides, I didn't have to pay for the ticket!

And to whoever stumbles on my blog, pakealam niyo ba blog ko to eh? Sure I can be erratic at times from being downright moody to mundane, BUT!
If you can't take what you're seeing or reading then look at the upper right hand side
of your screen. See that X button? Click it! (Oh yeah, and WHY do you keep coming back anyway?!)

ANYWAY, last weekend was my first time to go to Tutuban! (EVER, as in.)
I just loooove bargain shopping! Went there with my cousin Alyn, her boyfriend Eric and
his cousin, Cookie Borres (guys check this upcoming make-up and hairstylist...she did a shoot for Seventeen but I'm not sure when it's gonna be out!). Bought a complete outfit, with matching accessories pa! Reminded me of Lo wu mall... puro intsik din yung tindero hahaha.
I guess what made it fun (besides the company I was with), was that we didn't have to scramble for parking... and even if it was raining, we were indoors most of the time. Medyo scary nga lang while we were looking for the EXIT, biglang nag brown-out! Pick-pockets on the loose!

It was also the first time I went with John to the Parlor (plugging! Guys get a haircut at SALON DE MANILA!).
Ang TAGAL men. Actually I was kinda inggit, hehe, he always gets hair treatments everytime he goes for a haircut and always gets the latest 'do (but now it's more wash and wear, no more product overload!)...for FREE!

Hope's been "crying" lately. We couldn't figure out what was wrong with her.. either she's in real pain or she just needed to be placed in an airconditioned room (yeah, my dog's chuchal like that). Sunday 3 am she cried again. I was petting her head (that didn't sound quite rquite right! ;p ) ... and something caught my eye. The little girl was crying out for help because her head was so itchy! Caught a few teenie tiny fleas growing on top of her head! No wonder! And John and I have a theory that Greta's the culprit!

She seems to be in such misery nowadays. Aside from her itchies, my dad's been tripping on her hair BIG TIME!We had her groomed last May, semi-puppy/summer cut... she was sporting an EWOK look (yeah, in time for STAR WARS) and then right as her hair was growing out, my dad gets a pair of scissors and starts snipping away... because,as he concluded, she's losing her "peripheral vision" coz too much hair's blocking it! So now, her EWOK look has now evolved to the OWL look. I'd want to take a picture of her but she's too nakakaawa! She now even has this "paawa" look plastered on her face ever time I look at her.

Amidst the whole jueteng payola scandals, breaking news -- Senator Raul Roco succumbs to Prostrate Cancer (August 5)Sad day in the political arena, lost one of the few good men...

Deutsche's birthday too last week ( I owe you a visit man,soon!).

Rainy days and Mondays always get me down but nothing's gonna stop me EVAH from blogging my mind out.

Back from the Dead!

2005-08-01T01:53:00.000-07:00

HI!!!!!
I haven't blogged in the Looooonnggggeeesssst time! I don't even know where to begin.
So many things happened since I got back...where to start, where to start!!!

Hong Kong .... in retrospect:

OCEAN PARK! I finally went to Ocean Park! And damn was it raining most of the time but okay lang. Fed a seal, saw big ugly fishes, saw different kinds of sharks. Made me want to dive again!

Cable Cars (duh).

Adventure Land

Ocean Theater

I'm guessing this is Aberdeen...

Marine Land

Headland

Hello Mister Seal!

101

360 view of the Park

It says: I'm one tray of fish

Welcome!

The roller coaster was baduy, mas ok pa yung Space Shuttle sa Enchanted hehe. But there was this ride called the Abyss where Honey and I screamed our lungs out! Gave us a different kind of rush! Haha! And one thing we noticed, mga lolo and lola na instik (as in literal mga matatanda), had no fear whatsoever to hop on these rides.

After work last July 8, I did my last last minute marathon shopping! I just discovered much to my dismay that I liked shopping at Causeway Bay pala. Made a mad dash to G2000 to get my dad's tie rack and got myself a white shirt, without even trying it on! (and haven't even tried it on still...) Made another mad dash to Times Square to get John and I something we can wear together-- our PUMA LOVE belts hehe. Made a quick stop at Mango to see if I can get myself something pa from the Sale... to my dismay.After that, ran to City Super to get my dad some sugar free treats. Speed walked like crazy to the Bus Stop. Ang tagal ng bus! Anyhoo, for the first time during that entire stay, I was the only one who got off Sun Chui Estates bus stop!
Packed my bags, took a few quick bites off my Sausage Mcmuffin (which served as my breakfast and lunch!) then off we went to the airport.

Ang aga namin dumating! The check-in counter of Cebu Pacific was still closed and we had to wait around 10 minutes pa. My baggage kinda exceeded the maximum allowance, buti na lang we used joint baggage privilege. Had to get away from Honey and Andrew.. I didn't wanna be a witness to their airport scene...heehee. Ang layo ng gate! EXAG! I didn't know I could take the train! Delayed pa yung flight! But anyhow, it was good to be home! ANG INIT! HAHAHAHA!

So fast forward, the latest happenings, in digital:

Kristina Rocio Aguirre's Christening. I am now a ninang! =)

Ninangs

Jon-Jon's birthday party last Saturday.
Vodka Redbull and white wine overload, I swear I'm never drinking Vodka Redbull again! The whole time I kept on waiting for me to get hyper, but alas, it got my temper hyper instead! Nevertheless, I am content, because I drank to my heart's delight, the 3 months I missed out on the booze (except for the Moet et Chadon at Hey Hey!) and great company =)

Happy Hits!

Patron seat tickets to the DLSU vs. FEU game last Sunday.
Boohoo! Great seats, bad game. SHET.

Might be quite a while again til I get to post...til next time!

coming home.

2005-07-07T18:06:00.000-07:00

In 12 hours and 40 mins, my airplane will be touching down the NAIA airstrip.
I'll finally be back home. That is, if the flight does not get delayed. But as Cebu Pacific's slogan goes--on time 99% of the time (tama ba?). patayin na lang yung 1% na magpapadelay.

Can't help but think of Michael Bubble's song, Home (?) as my theme song right now.
We had our last sales meeting yesterday and my boss asked what we learned... and while I was telling him my point-of-view, I found myself a lil way close to tears,I was trying to control my voice as it was getting shaky...

KADIRE! Never kong naisip na masesenti-hits ako bigla! I was walking along Queen's Road the other night and it HIT me---I'm gonna miss this damn place! I'm gonna miss shopping, and my beautiful office building, and my dear beloved cubicle, table peppered with post-its.

I will miss the convenience of having the engineers at my disposal. Wait lang, I didn't mean it THAT way.
It's so much easier to work when people you need answers from are just around the corner. I will also miss the commute here... hopping on 1 bus and feeling safe that nobody will stick a knife or gun (heaven forbid) at you to rob you of your money. (WHAT MONEY!!!)

I dread going back because I don't want to face the responsibility of paying my bills! (Hello Globe, Citibank and BPI! fotah) I will never go shopping again in Manila this year. I think!

BUT, yes, I really want to go home! I miss my family and friends so much. I am excited to pinch Hope's butt and nose, to see my fat dog Dylan and meet the new Dobergirl, Gretta. And I want to see if I still know how to drive! haha!

What an experience this has been. Longest time away from home, all by myself in this cultural kaleidoscope that is, Hong Kong. Lived it, Loved it.

erratum

2005-06-22T20:25:00.000-07:00

"i believe this is heaven to no one else but me...
and i'll defend it as long as i can be
left here to linger in silence if i choose to
would you try to understand..."

erratum!
i just noticed while staring at my havaianas, the wrong spelling i did on my blog about it.

anyway, 2 weeks more til i get back. dammit. and it doesn't stop raining here! hopefully it does this weekend. or else no Ocean Park for me ever.

24

2005-06-13T19:35:00.000-07:00

i am the drama queen in the satire called Exhibit D.
I crash and burn,airbags cushioning the fall.
Swimming in this sea of unconsciousness, hoping for some sort of auto-pilot/cruise control.
I'm not yet 25 yet it seems i'm hitting some sort of pre-quarter life crisis.There will be a lot of changes when I get back. Yes, a lot.I've put my life on hold too much for something I've been following blindly.

Must gather courage to do so. Time to face up to the challenge!

I don't know why my general feeling everyday is STRESSED. I try to mind my own business most of the time but little things,little annoying things always get the best of me. I just can't wait to get back home, have a nice haircut, dye my hair again,have a foot spa and have a good full body massage.

24 days and counting!

Me and my alter ego-- happier times.

p.s.
Just as i was sinking to an all time low, something really babaw perks up my day...free tickets to Ocean Park! I was literally on the verge of crying when I got hold of the tickets. Hard to explain, but I guess you know the feeling.

just one day full of happiness please!

p.p.s. thanks to my digital artist, joesy, boreder out of his wits than me! ;p

you had me at HELLO!

2005-06-07T22:13:00.000-07:00

After days of reading MSN's gossip column, (yes, this is to compensate me not being able to watch THE BUZZ or S-Files!) I have to react.

Back in the day, when I was in 2nd grade, I already had a huge crush on mister million-dollar-watt smile, Tom Cruise. Yes, it was that huge we even had a Tom Cruise fan club. We had the Days of Thunder laser disc(where he and Nicole fell in love), and I watched it over and over again.I cried watching Rain Man, then there were A Few Good Men. I was stunned upon finding out he's sterile and his dyslexia.I thought it was a sick joke.Come highschool when Jerry Maguire came out, I fell head-over heels in love with him again. Even if he grew his hair (Mission Impossible 2 and The Last Samurai)I still adored him (I hate guys with long hair!). Come the time they showedMinority Report he looked great again as ever. I even watched Collateral (which really sucked)instead of Garfield. Tom was one of my first loves *sigh*!

3rd year HighSchool, circa 1997- enter the era of Dawson's Creek.I hated Katie Holmes with a passion. I hated the way she looked, the way she acted, I hated her nose, I hated her girl-next-door-I'm-so-helpless-help-me-pa-innocent-effect-but-really-slut-talaga image. Yes, I was a big fan of Jen and the sometimes mental Andy.

Anyway, I guess this would just be any normal girl's reaction.Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes?!? Maybe it's the Scientology. MaybeTom Cruise is really seriously going crazy. Katie Holmes vs. Nicole Kidman?!? Get a grip! Who are you kidding?!?And all with their PDA stints...(I don't have Oprah and MTV in our bulok TV here)how could you Tom, how could you?!? I just have to cross my fingers (and toes)that this is all for the sake of PR (for Scientology,War of the Worlds and Batman Returns)Okay lang si miss her-accent-is-thicker-than-her-eyebrows Penelope Cruz. But this Holmes character talaga, I really really abhor her with a passion! He must be hitting near-mid-life crisis.

TOM! Abres su ojos!

Ok tama na, O.A. na.

Bitter na kung bitter...baket ba blog ko to eh!?

What a cutie!!! This is how I want my mental image of him to be forever... not see him smooching around with the biatch!

Too much Lucid Dreaming?! Tom! Wake Up!!!

whore shoe.

2005-06-06T23:03:00.000-07:00

The shoe-whore that I am, I gave in to my desire and got me 2 pairs of shoes over the weekend! One caramel colored one (think of the color of the bag handles of the LV monogram bags)and a pair from Enzo Angliolini! I wish I had all the money in the worldso I can max out my credit card and not be burdened by the bills bills bills.

Anyway, a few days ago, aboard the MTR, I saw this girl who was wearing an interesting pair of ballerina-type flats in caramel. (Ok, i don't knowwhat it is with me and the word/color caramel) And it had little rivet-like studs on the back and front of the shoe. ewan di ko madescribe!basta makikita niyo na lang suot ko siya hehehe. And because it's caramel colored, I need a caramel colored bag to match it too! SHET.And of course, to coordinate the outfit further, i would need a caramelcolored belt too! Good thing it's a red-letter Saturday this coming Saturday!No work again! Which means, we only get to work for 1 freaking Saturday this month!Woohooo! Shopping na to the max ito! No seriously, I think I need to startpasalubong shopping already for my family since I don't want to end up panic buying right?

No internet in the office. I think and I hope that they've decided to do something with the connection since it just constantly drops all the time! So anyway, the holiday this Saturday is the Tsuen Ng or Dragon Boat Festival.Ewan ko kung anong meron mga dragon boat siguro! haha! And then, July 1, (HINT HINT!)is another holiday! I guess this'll be my panic buying day.
Kung may papabili kayo, sabihin niyo tapos padalhan niyo na rin ako ng pera ha?
I think this is all for today. Caffeine overdose na ko.

back from my hiatus!

2005-06-01T22:49:00.000-07:00

Hello hello ahoy aloha!

So bored as hell, I decide to complete this over-due post. I was supposed to upload this blog last Monday, however, was too tamad to put up the pictures.
Anyway, thanks to joesy, I have some pics to show of the blast that I had with John when my baby bunts visited me…almost 3 weeks ago. =(

Okay let's start from the bottom left part to the pic smack right at the middle.
1) by the rocks at Power Plant beach, Lamma Island
2) Tramming around from Central to Causeway Bay
3) Aboard the Duk Ling Junk
4) Star Ferry
5) Inside the Duk Ling Junk again
6) E11 Bus : destination Tin Hau
7) Queen's Pier, waiting for the Junk

Airport Express

Friends have come and gone, who’s up next? No to fine dining first, 140 bucks for dinner just doesn’t sound like the smart thing to do, even if you’re having roasted goose.
Heck, these birds all taste the same to me (duck, goose, etc. what’s the diff?!) I would rather buy myself something… I’m thinking about raiding mannings again or watson’s. Fun to shop at those places, I tell you. Interesting finds… right Hon? Honey just “innocently” picked up a box of *durex*, because she thought the freebie pen was so cute...much to her dismay!Haha!

So my wallet’s on a diet but that won’t stop me from the ultimate shop-til-you-drop (I can’t hardly wait!) experience – Shen Zhen shopping this weekend!

Trying to think of the other pics I can post together with this blog…

This I wrote last Monday (obviously I’m too tamad to edit):

Wow, it’s been quite a while since I last posted.

So many things have happened since then; a bunch of people came over to this good for 4 days 3 nights island to have fun fun fun.
As I’ve mentioned earlier in one of my blogs, Hong Kong has a shelf life of 2 years. Well, make that 2 weeks for me! Although an epiphany dawned on me, there’s still so much more to see like the big giant Buddha at Lantau Island (duh!).

Anyway, nothing much really has happened although the past 3 weeks have truly been great.
John came over to visit! I really missed this mokong of mine hahaha! Of course we went around the city, as useless, went to Mongkok, Causeway Bay, Tsim Sha Tsui and Central to shop. Wow, someone’s turning into a Zara fan. IF only they could bring Zara to Manila then we girls’d have
Shopping competition! I guess the highlights of that trip would be the ride on the Duk Ling Junk, and eating the most sumptuous decent meal I’ve had in ages…
Lamb chops at Lamma Island!

Shet. miss ko na 'to! 89 bucks lang!!!

We even got to squeeze in a quick trip to the beach, sans the bathing. And, trapped on a rainy Friday night at Causeway Bay,
we managed to squeeze in some time for Star Wars Episode 3 – The Return of the Sith. Sadly, I fell asleep for around 3 mins… and woke up to the part when
Anakin found out that Palpatine was the Sith. Anyway, it was a bit of a rip off since the movie costs 60 HKD each, and I’d have to say the cinema at Galle seems to be even better compared to that damn cinema at Times Square.

This week, Ther ther came to Hong Kong for a Nokia summit. I really turned green with envy when I found out where she’s staying, her per diem, and the 9 course meals she’s been having! Thank God Ther came and saved me even just for 2 days. Friday was the ultimate highlight of the week—we were looking for this restaurant which Ther’s dad said was along Charter Road… yun pala nasa Jaffe ! Well, charge it to experience, we had fun getting lost amidst the rain and me losing my umbrella! I think it was worth it… sinigang na baboy, adobong pusit, fried pusit, lumpiang shanghai, crispy pata, lechon kawali and daing na bangus.. what else could you ask for?!

The guy who treated us out for dinner was the brod of our dads.. who also happens to be labour attaché Bernardino B. Julve. So wag silang magkakamaling api-apihin ako dito yari silang lahat hahaha! After that wonderful dinner, we headed over to Lan Kwai Fong to this coffee place/bar named illy. Met a couple of interesting people. Met some people from Nokia Singapore, this Managing Director of HansBerger Global Investors, and this guy, who they say belongs to the family who owns Gold Coast land strip in Australia. Talk about high-rollers! After 2 bottle of Heinekens, we decided to head home as it was late, but the other dudes still wanted to party.

Last Saturday, I headed over to Sogo for their Thankful week sale. Thankful talaga ah! I got a cute cute bikini (which I don’t know when I’m gonna get to wear since I don’t think I’m hitting the beach here anytime soon and when I get back to Manila it’s gonna be bagyo season already!) and some shirts for me and my sister from Polo Jeans.
Arrrrgh! Shopping on a budget really sucks!

Yesterday another friend came, Ejay! Sayang nga lang Nadine couldn’t come along. The first time I was here we all went to The Peak. Only met them for 1 afternoon then as they were leaving that day na rin. It’s always nice to catch up with long lost friends. Makes you think, makes you focus (? Yeah focus my ass I’m blogging right now!) on your goals and career choices to be successful someday. Philosophize about life and other stuff. Okay I think I’m soon turning into quarter-life crisis mode.

Still contemplating on how to get that focus back. How do you function when you’re half-asleep? I’d like to know why…

ANYWAY, MORE PICS!

Where all the HAVIANAS have gone -- Lane Crawford!

With the BORRA girls -- Ther and Papot outside the Star House, with the clock tower as our backdrop.

With Ther's dad

Projecting while trying to balance myself aboard the Junk!

temporary insanity.

2005-05-13T04:45:00.000-07:00

Oh to succumb to the world...
working overtime to make ends meet...
working out the compromises...
only to feel that i've been compromised in the end...
such trade-offs are bittersweet.

fuck, you win some, you lose some.
why do i feel like i lose all the time?!?
kasi sa utak niya, winner siya lagi. gotta keep on reminding myself that.
ahh. the arrogance of the EGO.

Leithold is DEAD!

2005-05-11T18:21:00.000-07:00

I guess the title for this blog says it all.
I got a kick finding out about his death from my former classmate's ym offline message.
This guy, the famous (or should i say infamous?) author of The Calculus 7 (TC7), died last April 29. He was 80. More on him here:
Anyway, I got a kick because I ultimately hated his book--it was the BIBLEof the ANMATH series, which I ultimately flunked for, i think 3 times! It really made college life a LIVING HELL, especially for us Compsci students.I think the only time I enjoyed this book was when I really loved my teacher- Ms. Ruivivar, who taught so well and made me believe I could get the volumes of irregular solids.ANYWAY, binaon ko na sa limot yon. haha!

R.I.P.

I am miss procrastination.

2005-05-09T20:07:00.000-07:00

Last night I was inspired to do more today but everytime I hit my seat,I just can't help but check out yahoo mail, check out friendster,and read someblogs. And I think something to contribute to this 'tude of mine's the weather!It's really starting to piss me off. It's been raining since Sunday and it's no good.We're stuck indoors with nothing to do, plus it takes DAYS for the laundry to dry up!It's like I always find reason to get bored. I know I need to FOCUS but how?

Anyway, I'm so happy with Mcdo's promo. They're celebrating the 30th anniversary of Mcdo here.Buy 1 Take 1 McChicken! I had 1 for dinner and the other one I'm planning to have for lunch. Is that icky? Am I gonna get foodpoisoning c/o salmonella ? We'll see. And the jologs that I am, I don't even have any microwavable food container so I just stick anything inside the microwave right away.Haha! But at least I wipe the glass clean after.

Anyway last Friday, I told myself I had to go out or else I'd lose my sanity.We headed over The Fong, made friends with the pinoy DJ, got ourselves some free booze, and got hit on by some weirdo freak. Man, i really wish I took his picture! I've never ousted a stranger before but this one really really hit a nerve! If you want the full details of how the night went, tell me, I'll email you the story.

Went home really missing John. At around 3am-ish in front of the infamous HSBC building,by the bus stop, arm around the post, ear on my celfone,I woke him up,depsite the fact that this is a no-no (he's super insomniac), I called to cry my eyes out to tell him I super dooper miss him! Couldn't stand PDA couples (no offense sa mga tatamaan diyan!), every where I look, someone's hugging, cuddling, kissing, holding hands, heck MAKING OUT!grrrr! Patience is a virtue.
9 More days. 9 More days! This is going to be our biggest (andmost expensive I must add) adventure to date. John and I never really get to go out of the city as he's always tied down to his books or whatever other epal committments he has. So this is really big, as we both really really miss each other like crazy! I'm really looking forward to this ME TIME! TIME ALONE! I don't enjoy talking to strangers and really need someone to cozy up to real bad.

Anyway, here pics from Friday's (mis)adventures.

Still SOBER.

Give.BLOOD.

Hey Mr. DJ!

SPECTACULAR.

LIGHT.

SHOW!

WiFi

2005-05-05T07:42:00.000-07:00

I'm posting!!! From my flat!!! How is that possible? haha thanks to honey! She "innocently" asked KB (one of the seniors in our company) how he gets to access the internet from here and I overheard him giggling-- thru an unsecure WiFi connection here in the neighborhood.

Aaah. the joys of new technology, so many loopholes. I just hope I get to post this blog and not get disconnected.

It's already 10:45 p.m. and I still have a couple of phone calls to make. Can't quite get to that task yet since someone's hogging the t.v. Adjustments, adjustments. I feel like I've been adjusting my whole life. Is this how the real world's supposed to be?

Scary fact--things are beginning to become routinely boring around here. It's wake up, work,go home, work, sleep, wake up, work, you get the picture. It's so nakakatamad to think of what to eat for breakfast, lunch and dinner! I kinda regret all those bad dinner and lunches (alternate adobong baboy, adobong manok, fried chicken, tinola,fried fish everyday!!!)where all I have to do is eat the food coz I have no choice. Brocolli's so abundant here, brocolli overload na kami! And at this building called the World Wide House there's this floor there with Filipino shops that sell food, but we noticed the same din yung putahe (tama ba spelling!? ;p ) . Nasasawa na ko sa Mcdo, Fairwood or Cafe de Coral >_< ! Madami sanang mga karenderya-like places here to eat but the thing is, their menu's all in Chinese. Man, and this has to go on for 2 more months!!!

Kahit nga shopping nakakatamad na eh... *GASP!* JOKE! NEVERRRR!!! Nakakatamad mag WINDOW SHOPPING. Hindi lang nakakatamad, NAKAKAFRUSTRATE!

Bad trip pa coz I bought a local SIM so that I can keep in touch with people here, para di naman masyadong mahal bill ko sa globe pagbalik ko diyan (I've learned na my lesson!)...when I turned on my fone, SIM CARD REJECTED! Forgot my phone's locked to Globe. Bulok! Have no choice but to have it unlocked here. Or my little angel will bring me a spare fone to use (hehe!)

What to do, what to do. I hope plans for tomorrow night'll push through. I need some R&R!!!

temporary amnesia

2005-05-03T02:46:00.000-07:00

how i wish i could have such at this time. pretend that nothing has been going wrong these past few days...hoy mga tangina kayo magpasweldo nga kayo! grrr! i really feel like such a squatter here. pero ok lang, we compensate for feeling low by making the most out of our day...we find humour in our surroundings...parang ngayon, tawa kami ng tawa ni honey kasi meron gumagawa ng barney-ish sounds dito sa paligid ng cubicle namin. bwahahahahahhaha! laugh trip! as in. buti sana kung yung katapat ko yung gumagawa nung sounds na yun nasa hitsura naman niya eh, but noooo! ultimate turn-off! sorry honey, di ko talaga mapigilan.

HELP!!!

outlet.

2005-04-27T18:50:00.000-07:00

sa araw-araw na lang simula ng pagdating ko dito parang naging
miserable na buhay ko. nakampucha ang drama!

no seriously, when you're at this certain point in your life, you've got to be making wise choices. choices that have to be carefully sorted out, and not thrown carelessly to fate.

These defying moments also reveal to you the people you can trust and depend on.

are you in, or out?

Live Life to the Full.

2005-04-13T03:08:00.000-07:00

I'm finally in Hong Kong. The city I fell in love with is starting to give me headaches. Things are way too expensive. And with the measly pay we're getting, it makes us want to think twice about packing our bags and going home.

The weather's starting to worsen. Woke up at around 4 something in the morning to the pitter-patter of raindrops... RAIN! And i thought it was Spring already! I have a feeling it's going to be around 15 degrees tonight. This morning was already pretty cold. Think--Tagaytay weather during Christmas time, raining with matching wind.

It doesn't sound as fab or glamorous as it seems as cost of living is really high. Plus, i-match mo pa ng among chekwa di ba eh di namulubi ka ng todo!
Scrimp, scrimp, scrimp. Is all I can do. I'm scared that I might experience withdrawal and freak at the shops on sale!

Haha today I was "bored" at work and decided to help Honey pack around 172 SimMates.I even hit my forehead on the table while picking up something on the floor (major ouch!)

I'll try to blog again tomorrow.

count down...

2005-04-05T02:43:00.000-07:00

5 days till I board on the plane. Woke up with a giant headache! I hate it when i get overnight brain-freeze. this happens when the room gets too cold and the coldness finds its way to my sinuses.and plus it doesn't help when you commute going to work and it's way cooler outside than it is insidethe vehicle.

ugh...the heat of summer sunshine...!

i haven't even started packing yet. although, i've taken itsy-bitsie steps towards the grand moment of doing so, such as going grocery shopping (i forgot to buy Ziplock bags!!!)and telling my maid to do some laundry.

had our last lunch together with the boss and sales team. talk about instant hang-over! cheap booze over pork chops. went to the cebu pacific ticketing office at Galleria and grabe lang.ang haba ng waiting time. but at least we paid already for the Philippine Travel tax (whopping US$30 each!) so all we have to do is go to the check-in counter at the airport. i don't know what it was with me that time but i just felt like buying a half dozen hot loops.

im thinking no amount of water therapy will work wonders for my head ache. heeellllllp!
oh yes! Thanks in advance for mister lovineeee gopwet for helping tick a checkbox off my wanderlust! chocolate brown Havianas here i come!!!

Havianas-ing

2005-03-30T22:14:00.000-08:00

I am a demented ditz with attention-deficit disorder. i can't seem to function at all here at work. but actually i think it'd really make you feel good if you knowyou'd get compensated in time for you to pay your bills.

bills. bills. bills. i hate this part of being grown-up. i feel likeall my money goes to GLOBE!

just finished reading Plum Syke's Bergdorf Blondes. The book really puts you into ditz mode. not that i care though. i'm actually into books like these nowadays. Not in the mood for philosophical shit or action-packed books that will make me think. I'm really not into thinking mode.

i'm addicted to chocolate brown. And all the more addicted to laying my hands (rather, feet)to a pair of chocolate brown 1" Havianas flip-flops. I had a pair reserved at Souk last month. They said that the stock'd arrive around 1st week of April. I called them again yesterday to double check. They said stock'd arrive August. I was so devastated. Tried calling Rustan's but the Shangrila tower didn't have any in stock. The last pairs of brown Havianas were old stocks and none of them were my size!

So this morning, I got a text from Souk telling me to come over coz the Havianas just came in. Frantically excited, I took the liberty of using my lunch break to head over and buy me my lovely slippers.

POTEK. They did have new stock but no chocolate brown! It seems that everyone's going gaga over the color. I don't want white or pink... i want chocolate brown!!!
no amount of whining'd get me anywhere near a pair of my coveted slippers. i just wish i stumble upon a havianas store in HK and satisfy the craving within. tomorrow im getting a foot spa!

slip me.

All Dogs Go To Heaven.

2005-03-22T02:49:00.000-08:00

Early morning today, March 22, 2005, Swish passed away. Her almost a week of battle to kidney failure has ended. It's been a great 9 years we've spent with you and we will really miss you. No more carrying of our socks everywhere, no more deeptoned barks, wala na magsasalubong sa min pag nasa gate na kami, wala na tatapak sa feet ko, wala na babalandra sa ilalim ng chair ko sa dinner table...wala nang tatama ng tail sa face ni hope, wala na rin aawayin si dylan pag madaling araw.
ALL DOGS GO to HEAVEN! We will surely miss you!

PMS-hits!

2005-03-21T01:49:00.000-08:00

im trying very hard not to be a man-hater right now. im leaving already, i think i have around 2 weeks left. priorities, priorities. nakaka-inis talaga. im writing this blog (hey this is a freakingweb journal right? wag na magprotesta kung binabasa mo to at natatamaan ka)because im so pissed. kung ano ano pa ang inuuna. AALIS NA KO!
and more depressing news, we just visited Swish this afternoon and seems like her condition isn't getting any better. she isn't responsive anymore, and she puked yellow stuff. feeling so emotionally unstable right now. hate and sorrow. what a merry mix!

Swish!

2005-03-19T05:00:00.000-08:00

it's my mom's birthday today. but instead of rejoicing, everyone seems to be depressed here in the house. Swish, our golden retriever is now confinedin the hospital and we aren't sure when she's going to be back, or, if she's ever going to be back.

it all started the beginning of the week. she didn't eat her food. she vomitted. we were joking around that her vomitting had something to do with the bad weather--way too hot.like humans, when it gets too hot, we get headaches, get dizzy, etc. then she couldn't seem to climb the stairs. it was such a struggle. see, Swish sleeps in my parents' room, Hope naman, in my room. she likes it therekasi aircon. the golden retriever that she is, she naturally needs to be in a cool place. my sister said she was crying as she was struggling to climb the stairs. yesterday she could barely stand up. she wasn't eating her food. but she still ate the eggnogs i gave her. she struggled to go out of the house to do her stuff. come night time, the maid and i had to help her go out so that she could pee and poop. she didn't though so we just brought her back inside.
this morning when i woke up my mom said her condition did not get any better. Swish however struggled to get up to go to the kitchen in the middle of the nightto do her stuff. when she walks,she wobbles. parang laseng na bigla na lang bubulagta sa harap mo. KAWAWA TALAGA !!! ='(

just got off the phone talking with john. i had to cry my sorrow out to someone who'd understand. earlier when i got home, my mom said that the doctor called to say that Swish was dehydrated and had a high level of urea. And that there was this parasite that came from fleas that was insider her body, that caused this. Then, the vet called again to tell my dad the results of the lab test. really high creatinine level = KIDNEY FAILURE. i guess this was because of her diet. our dogs aren't fond of dog food,instead my mom buys meat for them and tells the maid to have them cooked, without any salt. sometimes i catch the maidsfeeding them leftovers. i know there's no use pointing fingers but i just feel really really depressed.

dejavu at dinner. last saturday when i had my teeth pulled out my dinner was jollibee spaghetti and as i was eating, i broke into tears coz of the pain and frustration of trying to open my mouth and chew my food. tonight, i had spaghetti again for dinner and broke into tears again begause i was getting senti-hits remembering Swish.

Swish i think is almost 9 years old (that's 63 dog years). When we were going to buy a dog, initially we were supposed to get her brother who was super hyper. Swish seemed timid and shy. Why Swish? Kasi nung time na yun, uso mga Italian brand na jeans -- Girbaud, Moschino, CLOSED, Armani, etc. My dad used to go to Italy and he bought us these pair of ultra super BASTONATION na jeans, named Swish.

She's such a good dog. One new year's day, somebody left a slice of pork chop thinking they could trick our dogs into eating it, poisoning them so that they could break in our house. WRONG. Swish took the piece of meat to my mom--as if to say, look what they left, i didn't eat it! She's been with us for such a long time it breaks my heart thinking that maybe her time is almost up. SHIT!!! Naiiyak na naman ako! parang ayoko na magka-aso na malaki, ang hirap pala alagaan. Nakapadpad na nga yan sa White Cove, before when the bank (UCPB) sequestered the property from Gotesco. It was my dad's company outing and we took her along. She even swam! And nakapadpad na rin siya ng Tagaytay. She was a regular at Starbuck's Libis before when my dad and I used to have breakfast there during Sundays. Super friendly dog, kahit yung magnanakaw dito sa bahay ata namin gusto niyang i-friend!Hyper too, mahilig manapak ng paa. Nakakainis lang siya kasi sobrang stink bomb. Now I'm thinking, SHIT! I should've done my part cleaning her ears... (tis no big joke, ako lang dito sa bahay ang may tiyaga maglinis ng tenga ng mga aso dito!)ako lang may tiyaga mag gupit ng nails nila. kung kaya ko nga ata paliguan yung 3 aso namin gagawin ko din eh.

TANGINA! I think this is my longest blog ever. it's just so hard. i want to be really optimistic about seeing her again. we thought na kaya siya uugod-ugod maglakad kasi medyo oldie na siya. i think that's a reason. the vet even gave her medicine before for her hormonal imbalance ekek.
im writing this in my dad's room and my dad is just beside me. i think he's depressed din. kasi siya talaga yung AMO ni Swish. As in whatever my dad tells her to do and wherever my dad goesnakabuntot sa dad ko. When we go out with her,she's unleashed. She just follows.
ARRRGH!!! Pray naman for her. PLEASE! Kahit I know all dogs go to heaven, ayoko pa.
SWISH... uwi ka na!!!

Swishie!

Chinky-eyed, lakas kasi ng Flash

Dylan, Swish and Hope - waiting for mother to feed them Hearty Flakes

PATOK

2005-03-10T23:28:00.000-08:00

feeling quite slow and unreceptive here at work. been running around paying the bills. seems that next week will be CRUNCH TIME as i have to show interesting customers. apparently those i have seem to be boring my boss (and me as well) out of our wits. i've been suffering from toothaches. tomorrow i'll be having 3 of my wisdom teeth pulled out (OUCH!). i don't know how i'll survive not being able to eat normal food. i haven't been eatingnormally since yesterday as my dentist had to fill in my teeth with pasta (left side). i had to chew on my right side which i had a hard time dealing with since my wisdom tooth on my right sidehad an inflammed gum. come lunch time i ordered macaroni which really sucked so i tried munching on my mom's barbecue. chewing the pork felt like chewing rubber meat as i tried masticatingusing my front teeth. not a good idea. dinner was potatos from the adobo and had 2 bowls of arroz caldo later on when i got home. apparently, i discovered last night, that our maid makes good arroz caldo. jumakpot din sa wakas.
i need to take a dip pretty soon. plans of scuba diving before i go on a 3-month hiatus seem to be bleak.baket kasi ang aga ng Holy week! kahit swimming pool lang pwede na. i don't think aasa pa ko sa beach.
looking forward to this hong kong trip to help me manage my finances (hehe lol!). scary thought really. i don't think i'll be able to live on my own with how much money i'm making here. such a cruel place, the world out there is.

I have this obession for Exhibit D at ETC. Tuesday nights will never be complete without me watching One Tree Hill (which was a re-run of last week's episode...grrr!) and The OC! I think Adam Brody rocks. His loser, sarcastic character makes him more endearing to the audience. And what a twisted plot!

ok so im just blogging..ranting ... rambling. off to work!

leap of fatih.

2005-03-02T05:27:00.000-08:00

listening to MYOP's version of Julia Fordham's Love Moves In Mysterious Ways this afternoon (music courtesy of Honey) in the office made me think of my blog's title...taking a leap of faith. "we make plans but then love demands a leap of faith."
When is enough really enough? When you've reached breaking point, there's nothing you can do but take those occassional "breathers".
men are bitches personified. they're crankier, whin-ier.
OK so maybe that was way too harsh. but it's just an observation... at home, at work...
sakit sa ulo grabe. just think of being a teacher to a class of boys hitting puberty, rowdy little annoying perverts. same goes for college boys , testosterone loaded, and then there are the dirty old men. and they can't think, you'd have to literally dictate what ticks you off.

last night was the season finale of Man Hunt, twas a toss between city boy Rob (who turns out to be freaking gay [and i was convinced for the longest time that he was just exaggeratingly Metrosexual] ) and stoking Jon Johnson. one couldn't wait to pose naked in front of the camera and the other just couldn't get it on. well anyway, for the love of straight men, Jon Johnson won. I don't have anything against gay men, love them to bits.

whoever psychologist formulated the theory reverse psychology please come see me, i need tips to make it work. either that or the person's just WAY SLOW.

time is running out, i'll be gone soon.

i'm stuck in a rut, waiting, waiting, waiting, have taken leaps of faith and just to take about one more, quite uncertain still.

MEN-- CAN'T LIVE WITH THEM, CAN'T LIVE WITHOUT THEM!

stoked!

city slicker.

Girly-girlie

2005-02-23T23:02:00.000-08:00

After having lunch with my cousin at Mega (we both read each other's minds and were craving for KFC!), I took the liberty of looking around Bench and Powerbooks. Ended up buying a little notebook from Rina Albert (I seem to be obsessed with her really chi-chi-chic designs) and the paper back version of The 5 People You Meet in Heaven. Oh yes, also bought an optical mouse (to replace our wireless one which consumes too much battery!) as by special request of my daddyeo. hmm.. potek parang ang laki masyado ng mouse na nabili ko.. RAT na ata (nye baduy haha)

Right now I'm craving for brownies...not the Goldilocks mamasa-masa type (which apparently is the only kind John remembers eating haha!)...craving for the one from Dunkin' Donuts or Mrs. Fields (plain or the ones with pecans...yummy!)...that would go well with my coffee break... I actually brought a microwavable mug kasi bulok yung dispenser namin no hot water.

What a drag. So sleepy. Looking at some blogs, found an interesting quiz from Angel's site to leave you with. ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZz!

You Are a Feminine Beauty!

You make any guy feel like a man, simply by standing next to him

You have a classic womanly appeal - and you've got a look for every occasion

This doesn't mean that you can't kick back in (designer) jeans and sneakers

You just prefer to be girly and sweet as often as possible

What Type of Beauty Are You? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

Sea Princess

2005-02-20T19:05:00.000-08:00

I am a sea princess (but not much like Tessa Prieto-Valdes please, although she's inspiring in a weird quirky way)...what are you?

You Are Ariel!

Headstrong and fiesty. You have a mind of your own that's full of romantic dreams about the world around you. Exploring exotic places is your ultimate dream, and although you can be a little naive you'll realize that there is something to be gained from your family's wisdom.

Which Disney Princess Are You?

FIRE.

2005-02-18T01:05:00.000-08:00

Quite not surpised with the outcome as I've been flaring lately, got mad at the stupid stupid KODAK girl (somebody tell her to cross her fingers to make sure she still has a job next week!) plus got into a big fight last night with the BF. Watching Phantom of the Opera with my officemates in a while to cool off.

Your Element Is Fire

Your passion and emotion are as obvious as the brightest flame.
You make sparks fly, and your passion always has the potential to burst out.

You are exciting and creative - and completely unpredictable.
You sometimes exercise control, and sometimes you let yourself go.

Friends describe you as sensitive, spirited, and compulsive.
Bright and blazing with intensity, you seem mysterious and moody to many.

What's Your Element?

Shoe Whore.

2005-02-16T20:00:00.000-08:00

Hi I'm Joy and I'm a shoe-aholic! Haha lol. Im the midst of problemizing how I can fix my presentation for tomorrow's sales meeting, Jonas buzzed me to let me check out fabulous shoes from PUMA's über cool upscale line, 96 hours, fablous shoes designed by Neil Barrett (uhm, hi who the hell are you, just heard of you now but i think i love you!). I've been wanting to own a pair of puma sneaks since around 2 years ago but everytime I go visit their site, I get dizzy trying to decipher which sneak's cool or not. Plus now, I've been wanting to get myself a pair of shoes which are dressy at the same time comfy... very rare combo indeed if you've got a budget that's way flat. Of course, style + comfort = sky-high price. So, what to do what to do. Starve myself for a month and a half, or...find a sponsor?

HELLO! Pa-sponsor naman dyan! Sapatos lang! Tsaka na yung bag and accessories ( accessories = jewelry, and that yummy Bvlgari watch I saw along Des Voeux road). POTEK. Kailangan na talagang kumayod. I'm succumbing to worldly things. But, as my favorite motto says, "Whoever said money can't buy happiness simply didn't know where to go shopping!" Yes, shoes are definitely my ultimate fetish and vanity is definitely my favorite sin.

Rintocco - a suede bag wouldn't hurt plus yummy Earl Jeans to go please!

Cattura Dove Gray-Seed (please donate a skirt and a blazer in the same shade with this and champagne South Sea Pearls please ;p )

Cattura Nut Brown-Amber Gold (please donate a gorgeous brown bag to go with this)

Gourmet this and that.

2005-02-15T16:06:00.000-08:00

One of the bare necessities in life is FOOD.
I have a secret (well not anymore after revealing it shortly)- I'm a closet-case chef.
Uhm, maybe.
I love anything gourmet!!! I cannot compromise my exquisite taste for something mediocre.
Actually, kung ano masarap exquisite na yon for me, be it kamote with margarine, inihaw na atay (okay some are cringing na),
isaw, or dinuguan, wag lang talaga ampalaya because it's the ultimate bleah!
So anyway, I wish for a kitchen all to myself, with a Viking stove, stainless steel appliances
(ref,dishwasher, countertops [appliance ba yon!?]), etc. etc. Cutlery set!
A kitchen complete with a countertop for making bread, pasta drainer sink, and a bad-ass oven!
I would like to have my own grill too... I picture my kitchen with doors leading out
to a cabaňa or lanai, whichever fits your fancy. hmmm!
And what would I be cooking? A feast of course.
Man, all this day dreaming's getting me hungry.
tummy rumbling courtesy of starbucks' iced mocha latte
Menu:
Hummus with grilled Pita bread
Chicken strips with honey mustard sauce
Tuna salad sandwich
Potato salad
GIANT MONSTER PRAWNS (buttered with lotsa garlic...yummmy!)
Pasta with chorizo
Lasagna (4-cheese)
Lamb chops with mint and herb sauce
Buttered Rice
lotsa red wine and lovin
and for dessert, the ultimate!!! Chocolate souffle with a scoop of vanilla ice cream.

POTEK.
I wish i had a house with a lanai and an infinity pool. Parteh everyday!
But back to reality...kayod (hello OFW life!) or marry a millionaire (whichever comes first!)

the spark.

2005-02-09T20:39:00.000-08:00

remember those quizzes...bitch test, lazy test, etc.etc. katamad when you've got nothing do to at work..not that you really don't have anything to do but things you've planned on doing just can't be possible because of technical issues...
well going to the spark should've solved 'em problems ( way back i could spend the whole day answering their quizzes and reading the journals)...but now you have to register..which is again, katamad. hahaha. so while surfing 'round other people's blogs, i found this alternative page.

so what type of personality are you? whut.

You Have A Type A- Personality

A-

You are one of the most balanced people around
Motivated and focused, you are good at getting what you want
You rule at success, but success doesn't rule you.

When it's playtime, you really know how to kick back
Whether it's hanging out with friends or doing something you love!
You live life to the fullest - encorporating the best of both worlds

Do You Have a Type A Personality?

feels like i'm 17 again.

2005-02-07T03:42:00.000-08:00

17... how time flies by so fast. that annie lennox song so reminiscent of the time i thought i was older, wiser...which turned out to be one of the best times of my life. 2 weekends ago, I went to Bern's party. Talk about blast from the past! She had a mobile -- yep long before house music was played and 'em cool na cool DJ's were present.. a mobile blasting ...cranked up full volume loud enough to get complaints from the neighbors... anyway, so she had a mobile, a band that played alternative 90's stuff and some 80's songs... galeng! forgot basta they played 1 song that was new wave...acoustic version.

so twas a good time seeing old friends. we should have more get-togethers. minus the higads crawling around!

last week,Gilbert and Edward, our Hong Kong officemates were in the City for work (?) Took them to Sentro at Greenbelt (Mikkel pa-discount naman diyan sa susunod hehe) and then took them to Dampa (as seen in my previous blog).

wait my mind is in disarray....

Sand box friends --Grace, Tanya,Gia, Anna, Moi

With Feb. babes Mag and Din

Bebe, Birthday Babe, Ms. Sayo, Moi, Neeners, Tans

Gorgeous Girls (Moi, Magic, Tans with Dons and Neeners at the back)

Me and my bebe (adik mode).

Tanya and Tito

The Band...(someone someone and Gino on the guitar)

attention deficit disorder.

2005-02-03T23:02:00.000-08:00

Help, I have ADD.

i can't seem to focus on one thing...at the rate im going im thinking of a hundred things per minute.. how to fucking reach my quota, how ill schedule my day tomorrow...planning on dropping off Drake's Christmas gift , seeing Frenchy and Cindy, spending time with mi laberboy, what to wear, what time to go to ate kay's, whut whut whut whut. plus there's that whole planning trip thing going on. how soon do you have to book a flight? then there's my finances, causing my tummy to rumble again... kape talaga is the ultimate !

2 hong kong colleagues were in manila for 3 days this week... we went to Sentro at GB3 and the Corned-beef sinigang was such a hit (well at least for Edward). Tuesday naman we went to Dampa at Libis. Andun pa si Mark Lapid na super feeling supastah..uhm, with his eavesdropping aide who wanted to take our picture with Gov. uhm hello? okay lang siya? then again, souveneir item din malay niyo maging presidente ng pilipinas di ba? uhm... ASA!

i am mentally drooling just thinking of what we had for dinner---sinigang sa miso, buttered prawns, chili crab, kuhol (?) in gata, sea weed salad, green mango salad (nakalimutan bumili ng itlog na pula!), calamares and ripe mangoes for dessert!

the place was pretty cool-- clean ...wala akong nakitang langaw at all. plus they had hand washing stations perfect for eating kamayan style.. liquid soap (yung hindi malabnaw na hinaluan ng tubig) with matching automatic hand dryers. oks na oks di ba.

now with the boss off to some isolated island (tangina galingan mo yan!), our admin officer still not back, we've got the office left to ourselves.

my skin is as dry as an iguana's... im getting delirious thinking of my bleaky schedule for summer... basta have to be here june for vince and claire's wedding...and that bohol trip must push through! have to see my lola nena whom i miss so much =( she's like freakin 93 na ata...so she isn't getting any younger, but bless her soul she still remembers my name!

in the midst of my incoherence, i leave you with pics . will blog again most likely when i get home to consolidate more stuff that happened over the last 3 weeks.

baboo.

looney looney gillie

ACS Manila with Edward and Gilbert

Sales Manila (L-R: Tin, Karen, Mica, Honey and my addik-mode look)

I miss my girls.

2005-01-19T22:45:00.000-08:00

Peering over my co-worker's PC, I saw her looking through quotes from my best friends' show, Sex and the City. Tuesday nights will never be the same again. Then again, MANHUNT took over their time slot,however, I don't think they'll last for 6 seasons as the girls have.

Some quotes:

Carrie: Maybe some women aren't meant to be tamed. Maybe they're supposed to run wild until they find someone -- just as wild -- to run with.

*to the person concerned: ARE YOU READING THIS?!? ;p

Carrie: I'm looking for love. Real love. Ridiculous, inconvenient, consuming, can't-live-without-each-other love. And I don't think that love is here in this expensive suite in this lovely hotel in Paris.

* my ultimate fave, last episode, ditching Alexhanderrrrh Swarovski hahaha!

Charlotte: Is it safe to buy pot from strangers?
Carrie: They're not strangers. They're our new friends with pot.
*hello Friends!

Carrie: I like my money right where I can see it: hanging in my closet.
* my next ditzy motto in life.

My Power Color.

2005-01-15T02:45:00.000-08:00

Your Power Color Is Gold

You're dependable and hard working. You never miss a deadline - and you're never late.
You have a clear sense of right and wrong. You're very detail oriented.
You get frustrated when your friends are sloppy - or when they don't follow through.
You're on top of things, and you wish that everyone else was!

What's Your Power Color? Take This Quiz :-)

Find the Love of Your Life
(and More Love Quizzes) at Your New Romance.

From Kuting's Xanga. =)

puppy cut.

2005-01-15T02:18:00.000-08:00

Hope just got a haircut!!! The PUPPY CUT. now we can't figure out how to fix her hair. uhm, she kinda looks tibo, obit. lesbo.

I brought her to my office last week and little dog wanted to get territorial... buti na lang cute siya kundi yari.

Last Tuesday, John's mom had a Thanksgiving party and she also had her 1st exhibit (Painting) showcasing all her Mama Mary paintings, which were up for sale. Proceeds to be given to the CAROL Foundation cataract or is it kataract? mission. They'll be buying eyes for those who need them.

Can't wait to go out, and get rid of my headache too.

PUPPY CUT!

Chin down.

Open your eyes...!

Meet the Fockers. My mommy and daddy, Alf and Pia hahaha!

Our Lady of Guadalupe

Office dog...

X marks the spot.

Wuwait a minute.

2005-01-13T18:22:00.000-08:00

it seems for the duration of my lifetime i've been WAITING forever.
now it's waiting for my career to go full swing. waiting for that big next thing. waiting for my bank account to grow. waiting to pay off my debts. waiting for people to change.
can't go ahead completely without worrying too much about what the other/s might think.

hopefully the 1st quarter of the year will be good to me.
then i'd be waiting to take the next big leap. get out of that comfort zone.
FIND MYSELF....because all these years there's been one constant state that i've been--- LOST.

Bored..out of my wits.

2005-01-09T21:23:00.000-08:00

It's 2005, brand new year! Brand new me... i wish.
After last month's slew of emotional shit, here i am posting my 1st blog for the year!
A recap of last month's activities:
1) Eggzmas party
2) Kuya Jay's party of the year
3) Christmas at Kuya Jeb's (yes, unfortunately, my cousin's nickname is shit.)
4) Dinner with John's family
5) Inuman at Alyn's house
6) Asian Tsunami.

For the first time, i find myself speechless.
The lastest salespeople are now in Hong Kong for their weeklong training. Oh the fun of shopping,alas. It's winter season...wonder how they'll roam the streets of Tsim Sha Tsui and Mongkok in the freezing weather. On second thought, I wonder how it is there to be in the Winterfestival they keep on advertising at Star World.

So many lives lost, in a split second. Swept away literally. My heart pours out for the victims of the tsunami. So will there be a wave of foreigners in Boracay now? Or Bohol perhaps...please don't flock to Bohol...make it remain one's sanctuary.

Im now teaching GOPWET how to make ham sushi. yum yum!
Slow day at work... and no Mica in sight! (papasok ka ba?!)
So I guess I can go home early then... extended work hours over the holidays just aint right.

Haaay.
2005 = FOCUS.

Little Asia Dec.30,2004

Kepels, Eggzmas party 2004.

wala ka talagang kwenta.

2004-12-19T19:49:00.000-08:00

The words are stuck in my head...reverberating in my ear. looming... a cloud of unconsciousness. I wish I could stay in bed all day and sleep and never wake up. Okay, before you think im psycho(maybe i am..a bit...)i've got my reasons. how way harsh are the words when you hear them from someone you love. that all the things you've put up with, all the things you've sacrificed...will all be defined in one moment of fury and in those words...
wala ka talagang kwenta.

when is it time to move on? i need divine intervention...now...before i totally go insane.

shitty days.

2004-12-14T18:11:00.000-08:00

There are shitty days...PMS-ing, stressed out and nobody to help you out. That was my day yesterday. For some reason (PMS is the reason!), I was so stressed out yesterday. I left the house early hoping I could get to work early (I left the house at 9:05!) but alas, it took me forever to get an FX as all the FX's available were those going to Ayala. Got to the office around 10...kainis! My officemate Honey said it was traffic because of FPJ's wake at Arlington Pasig. Shocking news to all especially the MASA and the showbiz industry as FPJ suffered a stroke last Saturday, as Star News said, while he was drinking beer with his friends.

So there I was yesterday stressing out at work (I was battling if I should head over to Mega to buy the freakin Ice Cream scoop which I had reserved),my boss asking for updates,and the super stressful Christmas party planning. Which Manager, in his right mind, would warn you about the change in the menu price 4 days before your party!? And to think I was even at Italianni's Libis Monday...he could've warned me. Oh well, at least we got 20% off.

And then there's this Indian customer of mine who's been harrassing me! He left a dozen messages in my YM asking if I was there, kesyo he has 100K orders for cards,ekek..sabay he left 2 audibles..the one that says -- I love what you've done with your window..and the one that says She loves me, she loves me not..ekek. And to think he's been asking for freakin quotes, sent me a PI already but never orders! TANGINANG BUMBAY YAN!
No offense, I have my share of Indian friends and I love them to bits pero tong bumbay na to talaga ibang lebel!

So I was in a rush to get home coz I had to bake cookies (yes,I bake, I'm selling half a dozen cookies [chocolate chip!] for P120.) ..bili na kayo! =) ... had to maximize my time as I had to do the laundry (can't trust the maids to do them for you!...my precious Zara khaki [dark] pants are faded already.tangina yan.) , watch The O.C. and Sex and The City.

Don't you hate the feeling when you're sorta waiting for a call that doesn't materialize anytime soon? I..get tired..of waiting...for things...that...will...sorta...seem...to...not...transpire...anytime...SOON.

Well, have to dash to Mega now to buy my freakin' exchange gift.

2004-12-07T19:27:00.000-08:00

self-portrait.

And all I ever wanted was for it to happen, but it never did.
It seems like the detour taken will stop at a dead end.
Mixed up, messed up. Like the cookie batter in a mixer. Full speed.
Tales of broken records and dizzying heights.
A sugar high a bittersweet cry.
Tangled up in lies, I think it's time to wake up.

flea control.

2004-12-03T20:08:00.000-08:00

we found out days ago that hope has a flea problem.
so to prevent it from infecting our other dogs, we had her treated.
she now has to wear this collar to prevent her from licking herself (that didn't sound so right)...as she loves to like or as we call it, pedicure her paws.
poor dog had to sleep in the living room and was crying last night, begging for me to take her upstairs in the comfort of our air-conditioned room.
i had to put the industrial fan in front of her to help put her to sleep.
what a baby. she keeps on bumping around stuff coz of her collar. poor little hope. 2 days more to go til she can take a bath and get rid of her neck brace.

john and i had dinner at Shanghai Bistro last night at Eastwood. Food was ok..still different from authentic Chinese food. I have this thing for barbecued pork buns...(mini siopao) it has become a standard for me to determine if the resto's good or not. We probably won't be going back there anytime soon... not unless 2 dimsum hungry friends come along for an eat-all-you-can dimsum fest.

what to do on a long weekend? I'm dreading the coming work week...it's going to be a long week again for us (work this saturday!!!). til then.

pics of my tortured dog.

hellooooooowhhh

help get me outta here!

i got memo-d

2004-12-01T20:03:00.000-08:00

yes, i just received my first ever memo. im currently not feeling well. i have a very sore throat and i can feel the phlegm in my lungs just waiting to be expelled. i drank a pitcher of water yesterday and will be drinking 2 more today. have to flush out toxins. so this weekend will definitely be a DETOX weekend for me. no drinking. alas. john and i were supposed to be celebrating our anniv today. but with me being sick and the typhoon YOYONG coming (where is it?!),it'd be best to stay indoors.

anyway, back to the memo. my boss sent a mass memo to us sales people for being
über slow in correctly filling out a Sales Order form. I swear i did it correctly.. or maybe yesterday i was just too much of in a rush to check. i wanted to go home so badly as my throat was hurting like hell.

my eyes are burning. there's a thermometer in my left armpit as i type...im feel like im deteriorating...my mom just got home with my STASH. thermometer and drugs. ahh. yes. nothing like those drugs to give you that placebo effect.

37.5... i'm officially sick.

here, some pictures goofing around. i miss by bebe =(

goons...

The Buzz

in debt.

2004-11-30T04:10:00.000-08:00

after some pondering it dawned on me. i am gonna have to pay off my debts by the year-end to have a clean slate next year. it doesn't help when just as you thought you've recovered from your present debt, wham! another just landed right on your lap. and i didn't see this one coming. i thought i had license to swipe during my hong kong trip but shit. no pala. my dad just made me singil from shopping with his credit card. and i didn't even buy those things for myself. i used his card to buy pasalubong for my mom, bro and sis. oh well. at least i didn't max it out or else i'd be paying him for life.

inigo's party was a blast. i think the kid really enjoyed himself. i brought my dog, hope! but poor dog, was harrassed by little children the whole time. this little girl kept tugging on her tail. this little boy kept hitting her with a toy gun (bad boy!). she didn't even want to eat! and my tito kept on saying" kaya ka di nagkaboyfriend kasi puro aso inaatupag mo"... well... hindi sumama si boyfriend EH.

yesterday, john and i went to galle to go shopping at the department store. you really don't know what good finds there are hiding beneath the stack of clothes. he bought jeans (bastonation...to his dismay) and i bought a black turtleneck for my skirt. all set for the party on friday!

i feel sick. i've diagnosed myself to have IDA (iron deficiency anemia ...not enough vitamins...), sore throat and colds. i'd have to muster enough strength to go to work tomorrow. i can't always be on sick leave every other week. hehe.

here, pics from inigo's party.

hello hope hope

Inigo with his Batman cake.. classic talaga si Batman.

Hi!

Kids...(the little girl sitting in between the 2 chairs is the culprit who kept tugging hope's tail!)

david bowie.

2004-11-27T18:46:00.000-08:00

i could not think of any title, im watching saturday night live reruns on etc. right now.
slow day, i woke up a little before 9am. I was thinking of going to mass at our neighborhood church but a quick change of plans...i turned on the tv and tuned in to studio 23 and the TV Mass just started. decided to have mass at home. problem solved. i can go to inigo's party later guilt-free.

am i a boring tita? i got him an Incredibles watch and a matching Incredibles t-shirt. John and I were at rockwell yesterday to look for a gift for inigo, look for the store that makes bags out of photos and watch ALEXANDER.

1) INIGO's gift- i went to gingersnaps to check out the clothes for kids. why did inigo have to be a boy?! it was so hard to look for clothes for him. i'd've picked out a clothing item for him in an instant if he were a girl. we then proceeded to this toy store and was shocked to see the new Barbie dolls being sold... they looked like they were plucked out of a cartoon show...think, KIMpossible... big heads, tiny bodies.caricature-like. but oh! the themes were cute.. a Barbie in a SEPHORA shop. at such a young age, little girls are already being trained to be er-er. As we were looking around for ideas, this eng-eng salesman (most likely purposedly) hit John's foot with a remote control car. and john seemed to be transported light years away back to his childhood as he tried to convince me to get that for inigo. Checked the box, it said for ages 5+. The kid is just 4. next please.
spiderman candy dispenser, flying superman (which wasn't flying..you had to hook it up to a ceiling and god knows what happens), playdoh..playdo?, a simplified BIBLE (why not?), puzzles (too complicated), spiderman shirt, incredibles shirt, incredibles watch.
as i paid for my purchases john told me that i was such a baduy tita... hmm.. maybe get him the RC for Christmas instead? he was telling me that what really mattered was inigo's reaction to my gift.. the SMILE is PRICELESS. maybe i'd've gotten the RC if he'd come along with me to the party. but, that's another story.

2) BAG with PHOTO- damn. too much. Php3,500 for a teeny weeny bag?! i think i'd rather GRAB myself a decent pair of jeans!

3)ALEXANDER- was not so great at all. the movie was too slow, too boring. Collin Farrell as Alexander already made me raise an eyebrow. They could've done something more to show how Alexander's military tactics made him win the battle at Guagemala. I particularly loved Alexander's story in highschool.. maybe because it was how animated my teacher, Sir Dave was as he gave us the blow-by-blow account on how the battles happened. Maybe he should've been telling the story instead of a very very fat Anthony Hopkins. Oh, but the Pederasts were a blast!
Kudos for showing how REAL they were. Jared Leto's lagkit stares and that other badingers deserve a thumbs-up! (make that 2). I'd've rather seen Angelina Jolie do a full frontal than the wife of Alexander... mukha siyang unggoy. And why is it okay for films to show girls naked but edit out 2 guys kissing? MTRCB...hello?

anyway, i still have yet to decide on what to wear for the party later.
i'm excited about tomorrow..just chatted with kuting and she said that they were planning to go wall climbing somewhere near my area. yey! always wanted to try that out! maybe i'd go to Shang after and get myself a black shirt.. im thinking of something to pair up with my skirt:

what to pair...?

♥Joy catapang and ♥John mangundayao

Are rumoured to have conceived a handful of surrogate children.
Can't stand to almost elope when permitted.
Defy the predictions and proclamations of any online toy.
Glow with warmth.

Orchestrated by ianiceboy

hmm...not bad... but Defy the predictions and proclamations of any online toy?! WTF?!

the daily grind.

2004-11-24T03:00:00.000-08:00

arrrgh! i hate my internet connection. PLDT DSL BULOK!
i just clicked on the Publish Post Button and waited for the next page to load..but alas. wala!
it really really sucks when you've already written down something and then you suddenly lose it.
tomorrow there will be a nationwide transportation strike. ugh. let's just hope those fx drivers are smart enough to realize that we need them!!! yes, i'm part of the commuting public. for the following reasons:
1. i don't have my own car.. but my ate and my younger brother do
2. i don't really want to bring my own car because:
2.1 no parking...don't want to pay for parking everyday
2.2 gas is too expensive
2.3 it's traffic going home, don't want to face it head-on
3. i don't really mind commuting from the office to my house because it's not THAT hard to get a ride(only when it rains, commuting is HELL!), the FX taxis pass by my office everyday.
4. either my dad or john can pick me up (but i don't count on them to)
the only drawback to daily commuting is going home with a film of condensed smog masking your face.

so what do you do with a sedentary lifestyle? try to spice things up a bit. but how? suggestions please. what do you call a pirated pirated cd? (uhm, a pirated pirated cd?)

It's my nephew Iňigo's 4th birthday today! Which reminds me... i have to get him a gift! He's such a smart cutie. Ask him where his parents are and he'll answer..."at work, working for my future." o di ba? i couldn't get over the fact that he was looking for me last friday, out of the blue. and not because he wanted to see my dog. i think that's a sign i really have to be at this kid's party and get him something! any suggestions to get for a 4 year old?

Hong Kong. Live It. Love It.

2004-11-23T01:38:00.000-08:00

There's a different kind of elation I feel whenever I see the Hong Kong Live It, Love It commercial with Jackie Chan.
First time I saw it was on this big-ass wide screen tv (uhm, make that monitor...it looked like a giant tv to me) while walking back to our Hong Kong HQ located at The Center. A few days later I caught it on Star World, and I just couldn't help but feel lucky. Most tourists that go to Hong Kong go there to shop, Causewaybay, Tsim Sha Tsui, Mongkok, etc. etc. I got a chance to actually feel like a local (the expat status is light years away) in the past 2 times I've been there.
Going home by bus, switching train lines, walking like there was no tomorrow. I guess the only thing I missed out on was the sumptuous street food...authentic squid and fish balls and other stuff that looked intriguing yet not enough for me to abandon the thought --- I want to know what I'm eating.

It's shop til you drop...literally (better be armed with a trusty pair of sneaks or the most comfy shoes). To work there would be an honor, but they say it has a shelf-life of 2 years. Short of a 2-hour plane ride away from Manila, it's even closer than Puerto Galera. Nights can get lonely and days monotonous. But still, I'd love to return, with my stash of cash, boyfriend (or friends) in tow.
Here, pictures of my last visit taken with my camera (I finally graduated from Jurrassic camera era into the techie-gadget age, thanks to BPI's 12 months 0% interest promo)

Tai Wai Foot Bridge..how I know when to get off the Bus..

The Bank of China Tower, some unknown building(to me) and the HSBC Building

HSBC Tower.. remember Spy Games?

The company flat (my abode) at Tai Wai.

My "Tea Bag" situation.

Leaving home.

with lunch buddies... (L-R) Andrew, Wing, Edward, Steven and Vincent..why do they look so familiar?

Hong Kong fashion, exemplified by Dorothy.

AUTHENTIC prawn dumpling noodle soup. (for only 70 pesos)YUM!

under the weather.

2004-11-22T22:05:00.000-08:00

whatsdut?

so i'm new to this blog thing. yes, i've found an outlet to pour out all those emotions. to those of you who were used to my nobela emails (circa highschool-2nd year college), welcome back.

Why NOMADIC RAMBLINGS? the words sum up who i am as of the moment... a nomad. Not that I don't have any permanent residence or something (although it would be nice to be able to experience living out of your suitcase even just once)... i just feel like it. LABO. and ramblings? Maybe because of the fact that I, admittingly, cannot last 1 day without rambling about a thing or two.

under the weather, as i could not muster enough courage to go face the daily grind.

last night's events seem to be surreal, yet tumultuous. just couldn't face the sedentary lifestyle i've grown accustomed to.

so pardon me, im new to this whole shebang, i'm still trying to figure out why when i Preview my post, the font isn't as tiny as it seems to be in this window..